Decoding Morality: The Influence of Words and Navigating Life's Obstacles

Ever wondered how to navigate the intricacies of morality in your everyday life, and why it's essential to instill such values at home? Curious about the power of words and the often underestimated impact they can have on our relationships? Get ready for a deep exploration into these topics and more. We'll be scrutinizing moral compasses, respect for all regardless of their professional roles, and the common misbelief that morality is tethered to religious practices. Men, get ready to take notes and learn how to be better supporters of children in every conceivable way.

Words hold immense power. They can build bridges or burn them. In this enlightening discussion, we will dissect the influence of words in relationships and how, without mindfulness, they may cause long-term harm that apologies may not soothe. We'll also uncover the strength of delivering impactful messages without resorting to swearing. Furthermore, we expand on the balance of compromise within moral boundaries, bringing into focus a case of a woman supporting her partner despite his neglectful actions towards his child.

Expect a profound examination of unsettling societal issues, such as young girls' attraction to older men and the manipulative maneuvers that may ensue. We also spotlight the pivotal role of leadership, the courage required to go against the crowd, and the importance of nurturing relationships for personal growth. As we wind down, we emphasize the role of a moral compass in navigating life's challenges, shedding light on the necessity of instilling values in our children, and maintaining these principles ourselves. This conversation promises to be thought-provoking, offering valuable insights into morality's impact on various aspects of our lives. Prepare to be enlightened.

Transcript

M: 0:05

Welcome back to on the mic with the M and T Listen y'all. Last week we had we had a hot discussion and it's up and running. Listen to your comments. We want to hear all of them because we were off the wall and hot last week with that conversation about Jada, which hopefully we want to talk about her again.

T: 0:24

I was just cool as a cucumber.

M: 0:27

Yes, she was. Yes, she was very, very cool. The producer was a little hot, so today's is us. The producer had to take another week to calm down a little bit, so but we're going. This week is going to be probably not as heat intensive, not as hot, but it's going to deal with a thing called morality.

M: 0:48

A little word, big meeting, and I want to solve by saying you should not need a Quran, a Bible, torah or any other book to live a moral life. Not preaching to anybody, now, you won't go there. But when people say, well, you know what, I couldn't tell right from wrong. One thing led to another, that's some bullshit. You know you want to goddamn get to where you got to get to now. You got to fess up to what you did. So the day we go talk about morality and how to really have it and not go church, you can go church. We suggest you do every your spiritual life calls you to do, but stop blaming on one thing happened to another and get some morality back in your life. What do you think? T.

T: 1:35

I mean, I think, first of all you, we got to start up with instilling morality in our household, because what we see is today like that lack thereof, the was it instilled in that generation before, like stopping access questions, because morality is something that is taught, like the things that we do and don't do in this house. Right, we don't treat people like that. Right, your mother would tell you when you go out and you, you know, walk past a janitor and you smile and you speak to people. You know we don't just ignore people. You know, and it doesn't matter what type of job they have. That's part of you. You know your moral upbringing, that moral guidance, right, and it's really something that you have to instilling your children. And so if you're around your children and you're kind of always on joke time, I mean it's okay to kind of laughingly treat people like crap or it's a feud with the. You know family, siblings, child's father, and it's right. And you know some the child's face. That's the moral, that's how they're being brought out, that's that moral. You know confidence and guidance being instilled in them and it's a little all over the place, because now you're being taught and guided how to talk to people, right? So if you're daughter, right, your adult child, and you're disrespectful towards your mom or your tone is just excessively loud or just out of the normal, right, what type of morals are you given to your, to your child, right? Are they learning to respect their children, their elders? So what happens when they become children, adults? Do they then, in turn, respect their elders?

T: 3:22

If you're a woman and you have it falling out with you, know, your significant other, your child's father, right, and your child falling out, what happened? The child is watching it all, right? Are you teaching your child grace? Are you teaching your child to maintain respect Even when someone's not respecting you? What are we teaching our children, nieces and nephews, because everybody's a sponge around us just soaking it up, even our girlfriends, right? Our girlfriends are smashing back off our energy at homeboys, right Over, acting a plum fool with just significant other. How you think my girlfriend going to act if all I act as a plum fool? She don't feel like she got to match my energy.

T: 4:06

As opposed to redirect in the situation, like na says, that's not how we talk to men out here. Don't disrespect that man like that who's going to redirect and teach and then still and show us, you know, exactly what needs to be done. And, morally, how to move has to be asked how we teach our children how we move ourselves. The men cannot sit in a circle and listen to other men how they're moving and, morally, how they're treating their women or their children. You know, and morally complaining about how to support and when to support their children and we're all going to listen to it. Somebody there has to say flag on the place, or flag.

T: 4:47

No you only see your kid every other weekend. That's not a lot, it's a start. It's a start, but it's not a lot. That's true, that's seven days in the week and you might not see your kid that week, any of those seven days. It's actually not a lot. You could do more and it's immoral of you just to be sitting there being some my yes person. Oh, you're wrong. No, no, no. You talking disrespectful to each other. That's not morally sound. That is out of order.

M: 5:25

That is so true, t. You are actually speaking the absolute truth because I know growing up that I'll be honest. I'm looking at y'all right now growing up, I don't go to God damn church and I know most of y'all looking at me today say, yeah, when I was growing up I really want to go church. I was forced to go church if my grandma or my mama or whoever I'm a go. But the one thing you learn was a sense of morality, even after you left church and you decide you know you got, became grown and start your own life. You may say I may not go church every so many times, you know you're not used to, but you still had a sense of morality that was that was instilled in you by going to church or going wherever you went and women moves, or the men who went right.

M: 6:10

Absolutely.

T: 6:14

That was.

M: 6:15

That was the key. Because they expected you, they taught you, because expected you to roll like they roll when you got older.

T: 6:23

As a kid.

M: 6:23

you will understand because you're a kid. Yeah, okay, I listen to these Bible verses or whatever they teach me. But you knew you remember those Bible verses when you got out there. You know certain things that were still in you that you just would not do. Yeah, I'm not even going to try to do that because I know, because you go back to all of us in the church and remember to tell me I shouldn't do that, so you do know that's a lot of foundry that's created.

T: 6:47

That's that moral compass, that's that's trying to guide you because you already built. That foundation is set right, absolutely.

M: 6:56

Yes, somebody has said it and you knew from that point on, you're going to get it. You're and you're going to go and duct church. You may, your parents may not have gone to church, but, god damn it, some of us in your ass to church. Go. Your grandmother or your grandma's going to come, pick your ass up and take the church. Somebody, a sister or auntie or someone's going to grab you and take you so you could say, well, when we were growing up, well, I never went to church, or I don't know what you're talking about. Yes, you do, because you went there.

M: 7:21

Now, if you chose not to follow the path, that's your choice, but you were taught. The problem is like you stayed today is these babies are today, are getting the same forceful I want to say forceful they're not getting the same training as we did. You may not, like I said, we want anyone go every Sunday, but damn, I was going every Sunday. But these babies, they get the opportunity to even go up every Sunday. They may not even go ever. They may, they may, they may have went there when they got Christian and that was it. Damn, as babies, as babies, and that was about the last time they went there or you know, you get the ones that may have gone. You know, easter, mother's Day, christmas, we call that those three and very important times. You only show up in church. Everybody get. You say, oh you bet, but you bet.

T: 8:11

Yes, you see, everybody have seen the lessons, so even if that's where you started, show up.

M: 8:17

Just show up to show up, and if you don't show up and you're not giving your baby any leadership or any guidance because, again, what I hear a lot of people say is you know I'm busy, the ones that don't go like I'm busy, I got work. I, you know I can get to work in the morning, I got this long shift, I got all this going on finding dandy. But you can at least put your. Give your kids somebody. If you can do it, give it to someone so they go out there and find that foundation.

T: 8:45

Now, when you give your kids to someone to instill certain stuff in them, be mindful, they will be reflective of other people as opposed to you. No, you say that again. Yeah, they're going to be reflective of those other people as opposed to you. Meaning, when you give your children to your parents and you rely on them only to instill the things that they believe in your children, you're going to see your child move in a way, and you're going to hear your mom as opposed to hearing yourself. Oh, you have to be careful who you give your child to to instill, and sometimes you're not even giving your child to these people. Sometimes you left your kid just empty, and so who's ever pouring that? They have nothing, and so now that's what they had. Yeah, you know, it's true, if your kid has nothing, somebody gonna fill up, they nothing with the something. And then what? Talking like the celebrities talk, or moving like how the guys outside move, as opposed to moving like how you told them to move and talk them to move, and talking like how you taught them to talk, oh, my daughter is not going to be just like dancing and moving any other type of way that she's seen on TV and on tiktok. No, we're not here right? I'm gonna do a little just like that. Now. Let me calm those hips down seven year old, because we're not moving like that at this age and you might know all those moves and dances, but you also know discretion.

T: 10:21

Hello, you move differently in different rooms and spaces of people. The more guidance is going to remind you of that. It's not just the way you dance, the way you talk, the way you move. Depending on who's in that room you will move different. Your volume will go up or down. The room fully appears. You can be just as loud. Make all the loud out verse you want room full of elderly people watching rock tone. Be super respectful to your mama and I mean super respectful and I mean like impressed. Do the stuff that we don't even normally do. Yeah.

M: 11:00

That's true mind your manners. You tell you what to do. A bond you got there, man, you know what you, how to act. That means you better act the food.

M: 11:07

Yes come back and you go in there knowing that I'm not gonna disappoint them, because I know if I do go out here and act, I'm outside myself. They're gonna hear and they're gonna feel Disappointed in you because to them is like I haven't raised you and trained you enough well enough to go out here and not act a goddamn fool my house or some by else's building or any function.

M: 11:31

You should be able to act Accordingly because I thought, that, yeah, if you're out there, somebody else forced you to act accordingly. Here's what I always heard. So if that person jumps off a bridge, you jump off a bridge too.

T: 11:45

Nah, wouldn't so either you're gonna give you, you're gonna teach, the moral compass and guidance you're gonna teach the morals to your child and Give them consequences if they do not, you know, act accordingly, or you gonna let it grow up and and life is give them the consequences because they didn't have the proper set, you know, moral compass to guide their Choices in life and they're gonna choose poorly and the consequences that life gives, you know, sometimes you're gonna pay a long time for those things.

M: 12:19

Absolutely, and we're seeing it now. We're seeing now what happens when you don't properly raise your kids with morals and standards.

T: 12:28

You become adults who you know no, relationships are easy and you know, go without thought, but you know it comes down to the breakdown of the relationships, right, and how we do just blatantly disrespect people out, like so loud, so outward right, people's moral compass, when family relationships kind of go in a little bit of a kaboom right, so to speak, like a blow-up happens, right.

T: 12:59

You know family, like we can't put our business on Facebook right, we can't go to the gram with you know our family's business, because to us that's just not a choice that we would make. It's not morally with our compass is telling us to do right. We know that. No, our business is not for public. You know consumption and it's just not what we're gonna do. Same thing when you you know you haven't fallen out with the family member. How much of a disrespect are you be willing to give?

T: 13:32

You know the people that you supposed to be loving and our blood tied to not much like her and point you like Let me walk away because this is family, right, and so you get hurt and level of respect because you know your parents taught you that and they instilled that, but somehow, when it comes to you know the make that you chose and that goes awry. You know some people are able to enter into this space and place of disrespect that's so extreme and taken so far, and out of the damn ballpark You're like where's your moral compass at?

T: 14:05

Exactly gets to be that disrespectful With the person who you just left six damn months ago. What are you doing Right? And then the crazy part you gonna come back around trying to love one later on. I'm so sorry. Oh, come on, come on Moral, speaking right there.

M: 14:29

You're absolutely right. And the thing is, people, I'm gonna look at it, I'm gonna look at you again. Understand this be very careful. You say to people when you angry, because they will never I'm here, I'm just racing say it against you. Really clear on what I'm saying Be very careful. What you say to anybody in anger they will never, ever, ever forget it. They may forgive you, but they will never forget it and it will always be in the back of their mind and some file cabinet. They'll always had that little tension when you said this to me because you said it. So that's, be careful with your words, because words is power and that will always take how you guys, relationships will be moving forward.

M: 15:11

I had to say that because a lot of people said words don't hurt, it does Mm-hmm words for a lot of people and people never forget it and and you have to be just to think about say, oh, is it worth saying if you, if you're doing from our position of hurt, mm-hmm, never do anything from position of hurt, hurt, hurt people, hurt people. Yeah, so it's don't need to do that, because you're gonna go down a road that's gonna lead to nowhere. It's not gonna lead to a nice rainbow in the sky. A little pot of gold was going into a pot of shit.

T: 15:41

I mean think about how the woman can can talk and and just like that that may rub you the wrong way, right?

T: 15:51

Yes a woman can use her tongue and not near one Cuss word falling out of her mouth. I mean, rip that man apart and everything you say is the truth, but she didn't have to say it like that. I'll be. If you're on the sidelines, you've been done. Wanted to cross to some of these men to stuff that the women can say. I mean just just a sword for a tongue, right? Yes, hey, you think that because you apologize for how you spoke to that man or what you said, that it's not going to like affect how he moves from here on out, right, asculate the man who was your child's father, but then you want to go and clean up the relationship with him. Like me, that's a lot of cleaning there, doesn't a lot?

T: 16:47

I mean you it's a lot easier to not shit in certain places because, hmm, the lot of y'all don't got the elbow grease for it. I don't, no, no.

M: 17:01

You're not ready for that. No one is ready for that, because when you're a matulated man, he never forgets it. Yeah, I was in conversations with uncles years ago and just sit as a kid listening and you said, damn, oh, let's just say that to him. I'm still mad. He's still mad cuz he's telling them Later.

T: 17:29

They do not forget. They can let it go, they can move on. Y'all can still have a relationship, but they're going to categorize the information and then they're gonna move accordingly with that like, in other words, they're gonna protect themselves from you. Perhaps they won't be as vulnerable with you as they move forward, perhaps they won't, you know, let you in on how they're really feeling or what they're really doing, like, because I don't ever want to get into a place of space where you can use such information Against me or to chop me down and make me feel and and the counterpart could have definitely done the same thing too right?

T: 18:05

Yes that doesn't mean that word. You're not going to move accordingly after, like it doesn't matter who's coming for who, the stuff that you hear people say when they're mad, those low blows, those damn kidney shots, yeah, mentor, don't give a damn. If she did say sorry, she meant it right and and. And she might not have meant it right, she might have just been mad, but the fact that she thought it it does something different to our mental spaces. And so for us to just speak so freely, like I don't bite my tongue for nobody, you know, I'm real, I keep real. Yeah, that's, it's a foolish, foolish behavior. And you're out hurting people and the idea that you hurting people, you know like with the, without the intent of hurting people, or just like not even Karen.

M: 19:04

Foolish, foolish, holy holy and and you're not a virtuous woman, I'd say that much no, no, no and Seeing it, you know, seeing when you're younger and seeing as you get in your relationships and you start looking at how you interact with people. I mean, this time in your hands, a man, the certain that you want to say that, you know, would just, it's like a surgeon. You just need a yeah cutter and your ashes. You have to ask yourself Is that that's when you step back and you say what's the end result? What's my end game?

M: 19:40

Yeah, I want to hurt her or do I want to destroy this relationship? Hurting her could do that and destroy the relationship, because women don't forget either, just like yeah, yeah, no.

T: 19:53

but you could be asking yourself, though am I throwing a stone in my bed, or am I not throwing a stone in my bed? Because sometimes you could just count it up to a stone, like if I move like this right, is that gonna be harder to land, or is it gonna be easier to lay? Is this a feather or a rock Right? Like which one is it Rocks in your relationships? Hmm?

M: 20:18

Yeah, why?

T: 20:21

If you don't want to live hard, no, yeah, do that by yourself. No, nobody want to live hard with nobody, especially like not a mental hard right? I think we just be in the other up mentally like it's too much Monday that's missing or need to be got out here for us to be out here like fighting each other when we supposed to be in it together. Go find you somebody who wants to do it with you or somebody who you want to do it with.

M: 20:46

Hello, hello, because if you would, somebody that you got to live that way with you should be in a relationship and something's really wrong with you. I don't know anybody that was living a bad that type of relationship.

T: 20:58

And you shouldn't be living with somebody who takes you out of your moral, like hookup, like what they can snatch you so far out of yourself that that everything your grandma taught you, like everything your mama taught you, your daddy taught you, it just goes out of the window. Oh, you're in a bad situation. Either you've letting self-control go or you gotta let that person go. That, too, it just makes no sense if you're not within yourself, and you can't stay within yourself even when you're angry.

M: 21:36

I don't know that's gonna work out Sometimes. I'll tell you it doesn't. You're just there At some point. You're almost kind of saying you know I can do better, but do I want to go out there and find someone? Yes, you don't want to waste your goddamn time with somebody that you know you're not going to marry them. If you're not married, you just date them, and you know you had this kind of relationship. It doesn't get better, it gets worse.

T: 21:59

Or you just not to say like you've developed an obsession with this person, but you're just kind of, because that sounds so harsh. But literally sometimes we become a little bit like obsessed with the person right, like you know that guy's not going to marry you, you know when he gets around your family like he's not even trying to really be a family-oriented guy, and then when he leaves you you try to run him over with your car. What?

T: 22:22

Like if you don't have Ben moved on, like he Ben told you. Remember that Instagram video where the woman that ran that man over with her car? Like, remember the other one where the girl tried to set that man car on fire and then it exploded in her face and knocked her off her damn sock? These women are obsessed. We always talk about and like, when you think of obsession and a relationship, a lot of us go to like the male, right, because they're talking to stalkers and you've seen it on Lifetime. You know your whole childhood. But, like, think about the women who are real-life obsessed with the men, who know that these men are not going to marry them, these men do not treat them well and they still going to go knock on you know the next woman door talking about where my man at you sleeping with my man, I'm going to go hit him with the car or I'm going to.

T: 23:11

You know, go call cheaters. What are you calling cheaters for? He's not your man Like you, just letting them play with you. You got to let go because these are obsessions and this is taking you out of your morals, right?

M: 23:26

Yes.

T: 23:27

No better than to sit here and be obsessed over someone who, first of all, is not even treating you well, right, hello, you're right. Well, you just trying to hold on to them for hold on sake, not even for the sake of saying that you have someone, but just for the sake of not letting them go. It's not even making sense anymore. Yeah, so your morals are being compromised in a relationship, or or you're. You know, you're spiritually guided and now you know the walk that your mate wants you to walk. It goes totally against. You know every, every bit of your upbringing.

M: 24:12

Mm. Hmm, yes, you got to walk away. You got to that show for my man.

T: 24:20

I was going to talk about a woman who perhaps is like stealing stuff with her man, but she went straight to killing and that was extreme. But let's go to for my man. What's that Date line? Or something ridiculous.

M: 24:33

For my man comes on BT, I think, and it's a show.

T: 24:38

And.

M: 24:38

I swear, I thought it was like a one season show. Okay, so one season with a woman would do shit for a man. Oh, you know, they have multiple seasons where multiple women from different backgrounds Some are, you know, come from the street, some come from very two parents, household, middle class and they will find them from that initial stage of, oh, look at them, they just want to find love and they found this guy and this guy and them get together and by the end of the show she doesn't kill three people to burn the three, she doesn't do all kinds of crazy shit for this guy. And now she's in jail forever and he's in jail forever.

T: 25:13

But it was for my man.

M: 25:15

For my man and the other body. I'll do anything for me because he showed me love I never. That was the one common denominator. Probably 85% of them will say he loved me, he showed, he was the only one in my life that showed me love. And I said, since you show me that much love, I gotta be dedicated to him, dedicated to a point where you messed your whole goddamn life up. That's what this dude should. Where was your, where was your moral compass?

T: 25:40

That moral compass, love, doesn't challenge it Right. It helps to direct it to a path where you gain more freedom. Like that is, that is guiding you to freedom.

M: 25:54

technically speaking, like to live, you know, just a sound life and T if a guy says can you just go commit a crime, can you go out there and strip for me, sell your body for me, plus, and let's go ahead and, just you know, dismember this body and put it in a freezer. Because that's my old girlfriend is trying to get child support from me. And you and your mind said well, that's my man, he wants me to do it. I think I should help him. Something has horribly happening.

M: 26:27

There's a crack in your damn moral compass. It's broken, it shattered that point. And if you make these decisions to go there and then the end in front of the judge and everybody was talking about you know I didn't mean to do it, I'm sorry to the family that that the girl dismembered. Don't hear that shit. First you're gonna say why the hell did you even listen to some crazy shit with this dude? Then then kill this chick and you're gonna help do what you do to the body because of love. That's crazy.

T: 26:58

Well, let's lay Malcolm, let's bring it back several notches, because you know that was a little extreme.

T: 27:03

Let's bring it back. Let's bring it back to the woman who shows up to child support court where her man, who was not paying child support or showing up to visitations, why are you supporting that man and more? That's immoral. He's not accountable for his kid and you and child support court Some of what he needs to pay for. But what, what, what? No, you should have been at home trying to get this man to come up with a proper agreement with this woman so that he could properly support, you know, his kid. Like we'll show up and throw that moral compass out of the river. You know, on so many different like every day, basic, still in cars, you know you don't normally do.

T: 27:46

You know just compromising your body like yes and it's not just like selling your body, sometimes it's just like you know, certain sex acts and sex Shenan against that perhaps you know, you don't, you didn't want to be involved in, but you got introduced into this lifestyle because you was, you know, down for some guy but it was against. You know your morals. No guy or no woman who's trying to drag you in the opposite direction of something that was right and that was instilled in you. Like, it's okay to be boring, yes, relationship or out of relationship, it's okay to be, you know, with with a lot of people you know Want to call boring, you know, and that damn board. You better get up off your ass and find a little Korean barbecue to go kick it and talk to the random people that's in there, because, like I, dead boring, I go out the that damn board.

M: 28:49

Hell, no. And again it goes back to Somebody didn't steal those values in you, young for whatever reason, but as a parent.

T: 29:02

Being that peace with yourself to. That's something else you got to be remind mindful. You know not that need for always being busy and you know it's Needing someone's attention right Now. You don't always have to be up in someone's face, you know, subtle your mind with something as basic as reading or just, you know, finding a hobby or something to do, especially for the woman who kind of Enjoy some kind of gets off almost like a drug on attention sometimes right, mm-hmm.

T: 29:34

Mm-hmm, I don't really want to talk about that for the woman side of things, but you know that that's something that as a woman and and kind of coming into age, that has to be taught also right, like yeah, that shit is cute and you'll see, your, your daughter, you know, agent start getting attention from here and from there, and how they kind of respond to it.

T: 29:58

You also have to read our rectum. Keep them humble as far as that is concerned, because for a woman, then that that attention is. It's something that can really be, you know, enjoyable for a woman and can be something that takes you away From where you really need to be at a, you know T.

M: 30:16

That's very important because with young women growing so, developing so quickly, now.

M: 30:24

It's like you should be able to say oh yeah, she's 13. Oh yeah, she's 18. Now You're like well, how are you good girl, I'm 10, good lord, what the hell. So you now have to say somebody to talk to her, because now she's going to get unwanted attention Because she's gonna look a certain way Boys being visual, men being visual and she's gonna be in a light that she should not be it. So somebody didn't still hurt something her waiting for 10, but younger, that you need to carry yourself a certain way. You don't dress certain way, you don't try to act a certain way, you don't want to get too old because you're not ready for the work. And what's going to happen when you put yourself in that arena, because you're not gonna that I go. So well, are you 10? You go, look at you. So she look 18 to me.

M: 31:15

And now she's in a situation because she wants the attention, like she wants the attention. But if she's properly trained, if she's properly has the moral Old background, she knows that hey, along the way you're gonna get some attention. And then she's gonna know oh, this is what they're talking about. So she's not flashed. You know, I pressed by somebody saying girl, you she'll look good. No, she likes. Okay, keep moving, because she doesn't need it because that's, that's, that's, that's absolutely true.

T: 31:45

Those young, tender age really, when you notice People of all ages will start to notice you, maybe not as as young as, but, yeah, I can recall even even very young, young ages, you know, this man kind of pay a little more attention and linger their eyes a little bit longer in your direction. Mm-hmm, as a young girl coming into age, if you are taught and Constantly remind it, and that's how you, you know, something is instilled in you, then you do know how to move through those situations and you do know what that attention gets you right, told you, and then your auntie reinforce it, and then your auntie, your other auntie, you know, she just blatantly and blurted it out, you know, cuz she, she don't got no free right the way. As long as you get those teachings and those upbringings, then you do understand and you are able to Move and navigate a maneuver properly, right. The Attention from you know, an adult man is that's, that's totally different than attention from my peer.

T: 32:53

Those are the people who supposed to be giving me that attention because, if I add the same, a man, 28 years old and I'm 14, well, he done missed the 27 year olds, the 26 year olds, every damn group, down to the 14 year old group. So you telling me Nobody else was worth that man's time and any of the age group of it. Me, I'm the prize. How the fuck could I possibly Be the prize out of all of these other damn group? That's basically what my mom kept telling and teaching and instilling in me, like no, be easy and be very careful, because Cream of the crop for like boo boo, you got it going on and I'm into my own one. Yes, I had it going on. Your mom did that.

M: 33:44

Yeah.

T: 33:46

All that. But you know, 14 and grown-ass men, no, there's something wrong with them, it's everything right with you. And baby girl, you got it going on. And those young girls look like something, they're beautiful and they are gorgeous. And, just like I said, I had it going on, they got it going on. Yeah, gorgeous and they are coming into their age. But baby girl, those men, not it, that's not it. They have been tossed over by every other group all the women, the group you don't say absolutely your face because nobody else wanted them.

T: 34:28

Leave them right on the outside and date within your peer group.

M: 34:31

Absolutely because you, because, again it's, it's a factuation to you. Oh, my god, he sees me but a beauty, I know.

T: 34:41

He got the time, he got the attention. He don't go to school with me. You know he's not petty, he's not gonna run his mouth and tell my business like all my other peer guys are. I feel free with him. Young girl shit. You know it's young girl shit. Yeah, oh, come on. Yeah, oh, that's right. So we, yeah, leave that out there.

M: 35:03

That shit is wack all that shit's wack because they get anybody that old talking to you and your Child yeah, you better take advantage of the situation. Yes, he will. And how many people do we young ladies do we know in our lifetime have been pregnant by such guy?

T: 35:19

and I'll take it to the other side of the spectrum. You won't even have to go so far as that man Just the very idea that he's there and enjoying my conversation in my time no, he ain't even worth that Much for me, just off of that piece right there, cuz they know you're not even worth no other woman's time on the phone and energy in the park. You're not worth minds either.

T: 35:44

Oh, no I know by you that means everybody else in this building is noticing me too, and they just too big of a coward to even mention it. So I'm gonna keep walking my little step. You know, keep, keep your moral compasses all the way grounded, ladies, you know, keep walking. Them might not be telling you that they know the same you, but they are, and you know keeping cute. So what you do, stay grounded.

M: 36:11

Absolutely. And as for guys, so this young boys are now getting the same attention. Teachers. I'm like I read a story with a chick lady. A grown woman was 35. It had a baby by the boy was 13 years old, had a baby by the.

T: 36:36

She started hiding pregnancy From a mind you and what, which one, which cuz it's been so many stories like that with the teachers. Then them popped up pregnant like what.

M: 36:48

What's going on? That's not gonna work. But the female teachers bang my damn Teenage son. That's bullshit, you know, of course there'll be a lot of guys, oh man, but if I had teacher like that when I was a age, I know, man, what you call it. It's still right, it's still the same situation either way.

T: 37:04

You you paint the picture. Yeah, 35 year old woman who wasn't wanted inside of no circle amongst 35 year olds, 34 year olds, 33 year olds and every other age group down until your age group that brought not either. You will fix whatever you know Is broken on you to wear. You know you can't come into a Comparable relationship with another man. So now you over here playing in little boys land Like One, any, any boy who's that mature to hang out with the teacher. You know he probably the cream of the crop in the classroom any day away. So you messing up the little girls situation. Young man Women, young girls checking for you in that classroom. Okay, they might not have mentioned it right now, but they have noticed. You Like we're not even going to pretend. Like these women and these men who are on they pedophile, your kid pedophile. You kick like that shit is not okay.

T: 38:02

And the young who was enjoying that attention and that money, that that should rock out, because it's not it.

M: 38:09

Definitely not it and just is ruin you. You're doing your experience of growing up, of enjoying that, that transition from being adolescents to young adulthood. That's your time to grow within yourself, to learn who you are, define who you are not.

T: 38:26

From some per your group Learned all that dumb, goofy shit within your peer group.

M: 38:33

So where's their fucking moral compass?

T: 38:35

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. So anybody who you link up with, who challenges your moral compass, something's not right with them. You need to walk away.

M: 38:45

Absolutely. And that goes back to to becoming a leader and not a follower, because so many, when you set peer group, that goes back to people don't want to feel like an outsider, you don't feel like the oddball out, they want to feel like an outcast. Well, strangely enough, leaders are all that. You have to be a leader, to be an outcast, to be an outsider, to be somebody that that somebody looks at differently. Because you're the one that says I don't know, fuck, what y'all doing. Y'all could go and marching to the sea. I'm not gonna be that dumb motherfucker cuz. Why am I following y'all? Yeah, so, because you're feeling that way, young people, that means you, you're on a different flow. That means, hey, embrace that leadership quality and you may feel Outside, you may feel like, oh, you know what, I don't want it. But you rather be a leader than a follower, because you never know where the followers of who they're following. As a leader, you always know you're going.

M: 39:40

So that's how we have to instill on our kids too, because you know kids come back. Well, you know, I know I want to play with me today because I've I play something different or I could play something different. There's another kid, that part, one place anything you want to play but was too scared or, you know, didn't Suffice that wasn't self-assured of say, you know, I want to do it because they're playing that, i'ma, I want to play that, but if you play it because, oh, there's another kid that plays that, so you have to walk in your truth. As far kids say that because do that because they're young, they will be part of the.

T: 40:14

It's like being the first one in the group of friends who gets married, right, mm-hmm, somebody who has their mouth open. Oh my goodness, I can't believe she got married at this age. You just signed up to do some man's laundry for the rest of your life, baby. Believe it or not, it's okay and it's not they. Marriage is just because you're, you know point of view. It's different or perhaps is not as enlightened as mine. You know Exactly. That's okay, but I'm gonna move accordingly. You cannot be afraid to move against the grain, especially when you're, when you know where your moral compass is guiding you right.

T: 40:52

Yes yes, hey, I'm done dating, I'm not living. You know that the lifestyle where you jump in and out of relationships and have all these partners I would like to, you know, be, do something a little more solid, like, no, I do want a traditional life, so I do want to be married, or Maybe it's nothing, not as extreme. You know, I do want a long-term relationship, but mostly your Peers are doing you know the single lifestyle or you know the busy lifestyle and you know that's not for you. You have to bow out and Watch how, when you put your moral compass right where it's supposed to be and you making the right choices, watch how many people start to follow you. And then you'll go to the point where you are not the first one, not just the only one in the group who's married.

T: 41:37

Now, everybody's married. And you were the first group to be married. Right, absolutely, outside it. Right, so you didn't get to hang out with all your friends at first. Right, yeah, so often figure out their own self. Right, absolutely, because what you did was right. Right, mm-hmm, you'll start to see people to follow.

M: 41:57

That's true, t. And the other thing is people have to understand you have to follow your path. You know you can't look around at your friends who you know she married and I ain't married or I want to be married.

M: 42:10

No, no, no no, stop looking at what other people doing and look at what's your path. That's probably with Social media. Today, everybody wants to look at everybody's life on social media, which we all know 90% is a lie anyway. So they were they doing so much. I ain't doing shit. You're part of that. That one glass of champagne's only fucking depart.

M: 42:29

Took that from a table and sit at a table, just took it and then put it. Put it back around round the door. You don't know this. Yeah, I'm learning your path.

M: 42:36

Understand where you want to be, and that also goes back to understanding who you are. Again, if you ever, if you have a tight moral compass and you know pretty much this is what I want to do, whatever it is Stay the course because again, you can't live your life being living through your mom, your dad or your friends. You'll be, you'll wake up and you'll be 50 years old and you got shit going on, you still doing the same shit you did when you was 20, and I don't think anybody wants to be For 50 years old still doing the same shit they was when there's 20, unless it's a job that they now probably Should be high up in the job, but when it comes to how you run your life. You should not be in that same spare, if it's, if that's good. You've been rocking, you're rocking the rocking chair. You didn't move. You think you move, but you're just going back and forth. Yeah, so you gotta be, gotta know who you are.

M: 43:26

Hey, what you said before is about being by yourself. Being by yourself at some point in your life is the greatest thing will ever happen to you, because at that point you know I have any extractors of boyfriends, girlfriends, kids, anything like that. It's just you that now makes you sit back and say, whoa, what am I doing? And it's not a matter just trying to find someone, because find somebody to me always seem like it was just a way of keeping busy.

M: 43:51

As you said before, there's a time where you, if you feel like your life ain't going where it should be going, you probably need to step back and say you know what? Let me just step back, let me take a little pit stop and reevaluate what am I doing, and what am I doing is going to where I ultimately want to go, and if not, I need to make some changes. Now I can't say, oh, yeah, down the road, make some change. No, down the road is today, because Decisions you make today Influences down the road. Because people always say, well, the future? No, the future is actually now. So, yeah, you make right now how your life will be five years from now, ten years from now, next month, next year.

T: 44:32

So so you know, we always say it like in seeds, right, you saw seeds of today, right Today. What you gonna get tomorrow, are your seeds gonna sprout later on? Are you gonna? Is it gonna be a fruit tree and that tree what you gonna have? Stones on your tree. What type of seeds are you planting for the right now, because later on, when you looking for a harvest or something to drop down, you?

M: 44:58

have anything?

T: 45:01

Yes we're again and let your moral compass guide you as you move about to make the right choice the plant the proper seeds. That moral compass is gonna Make you mindful to go back and water those seeds right, because morally you know that you have to nurture things right and take proper care, right.

T: 45:20

I'm gonna say, oh no, take poor care of the things that you get, that you take pride in and take care of right it's gonna say proper care in those things, and so when you take proper care of something, you plant the seeds. Take proper care of something, you plant those proper seeds, you're gonna get something out of it, especially something that you actually wanted.

M: 45:43

Absolutely.

T: 45:45

It's gonna be higher.

M: 45:47

Everything T people on the stand is it's not gonna happen overnight. Over many podcasts, we've said it many times it's not gonna be a pill, it's not gonna be a shot. I'll be several very quick Mm-hmm. Have the patience mm-hmm for this thing to grow. The trees are all grown overnight, so you can you plan through the day. Is that go tomorrow? The, oh, the tree in here.

T: 46:10

Yeah, like the cycle of that fruit tree, right Just?

T: 46:13

a free is going. First of all, we are get that seed to sprout Like hold on, that's a whole feet and it's on, if you know anything about plants. Getting that seed to sprout Like, oh okay, because some of them are surrounded by, like you know, that outer casing of something ridiculous, right, that whole net, right, mm-hmm, that hard stone like thing. All right, now we got that dang on thing to sprout. Now what's the tree? Okay, it's like about three or four to five years for some of those trees to even flower before from it. As you put that seed in it and just because you see those, you know trees forming, you still don't got no fruits to get from it. Yet. You still got to take the time, nurture it and, you know, act accordingly. In the meantime, you have to.

M: 47:00

And again, it's almost like Growing a tree is like growing raising your kids, and I can. This picture I've always seen and I gotta buy that picture too. But it's it's two people and it's one. Both have seeds and One is watering the other one. Just do the seed out there and if you watch it it's like a little pamphlet. If you flick it you see that the one, the guy who's watering the tree and every day put stuff on the tree. If the tree is growing straight and healthy, the other trees is Barely a little root, just just a little buzz out the ground. He looked in, the guy looking at the ground, like what?

T: 47:37

the hell it's a little seedling.

M: 47:39

Yeah, it's just that's it. This guy suffers Everyday. There's one guy putting water on it. He's meticulous, he's on top of it, he's, he's making sure it's good, it's healthy.

T: 47:50

He's caring for it.

M: 47:52

Yeah, I look at all through it out there. So you know, I let nature figure it out. So, at some point, the guy who took care of the tree. The tree is beautiful and healthy. The other guys tree in a being.

M: 48:03

A puny little Unhealthy tree just bent over and he asked the guy you know, I think at the end it asked him like, why your tree so bigger than mine? He said because I took care of the tree. The tree needed nurturing, he, the tree needed nutrients. I was here to take care of the tree. So if you take care of the tree, you're gonna be able to see the end, this beautiful tree, because you took care of it. You, on the other hand, just do the damn seed out there and so it's gonna rain from the sky. It'll grow, it'll be alright. Left it to chance. Left it to chance.

M: 48:36

And pretty much that's what's happening with the kids today. You had the parents and the guardians and the families who are basically nurturing the kid and Feed the kid, knowledge and giving them more bases in order to grow from. And other people just say okay, kids here, I'll let that. Whoever raise them, if the streets raise them, I'll let. Wherever they'll be, they'll be alright, they'll end up, you know, being where they're gonna be. And then we all see the tree that's been properly taken care of, got more guidance, been, you know people been, put them in the position to be successful, can't be successful.

T: 49:09

Say the same thing about the relationships that we see today. Hmm, yes relationships where you know you taking care, you put the work in and you've actually nurtured that that Relationship and you see it thriving. With some relationships you know you get together and you just leave it to chance, like Romanticism, right, and if the romance runs out, you know, then you feel the talent right you don't know work like the relationship that's gonna work for itself and it's like now.

T: 49:40

You got to put the care at that time and the nurturing even into the relationship, into yourself, to actually grow and to thrive as a person.

M: 49:49

You have to a tee. We're two examples of that. You put the, you put that into your marriage and now you are married with beautiful kids and thriving my marriage, a beautiful son and thriving.

T: 50:05

Yeah, you can tell it's still working.

M: 50:07

It's always Always got to work because we're constantly changing. So when I tell people, you know it's my Silly sense of note one time said, yeah, yeah, just look like two people just know everything. I said, no, we don't know everything, but what we did was we got spouses that are our teammates, are true teammates.

T: 50:28

So I got it like marriage. Marriage like, yeah, like it comes out and it's like it'll whoop your ass. And if you not, mom and sir said like in the marriage, you got to put your battle gear on right.

M: 50:41

Yep.

T: 50:42

Live the idea having you be boxing and if you not boxing it back, it gets the best of you. Then you defeat it. Then that means you're done right Out there in, like life is battling you right, because, like life, whoop your ass right? Yep, yes, you will battle in life back. Then, yeah, you're dead, you're. That's just the end of it. You stop fighting and then you know that's the end and it's the same thing within the relationship.

T: 51:10

It can be a relationship with your parents, the relationship with your siblings, with your cousins. All these relationships have the capacity to literally Whoop all of our asses. And if you're not back there fighting for that relationship for your sister, like yo, no, no, we're not doing that and we don't need to be as close as we used to be, but we're gonna have some bit of a relationship where we can both thrive as sisters together. Like you, my mom, you ain't going nowhere. You know I need respect here. You need respect there. Let's find the middle ground, like we don't got to be super close, but let's fight for something that's ours right.

T: 51:48

Absolutely absolutely hours, because the relationships have the capacity to real life get you where you know you don't want to. And if you can fight through those things, you know people act right you. You, just a tree standing like you ain't never been moved before, like life never happened to you before and it has. But if you're able to get past those things, keep growing, keep thriving you have to and your roots off foot in the ground to.

M: 52:21

That's the other thing. Your roots are so Deep in the ground it's gonna take a lot to know, a lot to move. So that's why you, you take it. You can take the 100 degree weather comes a little, 100 mile an hour, wind come.

M: 52:40

Yeah, you know a little bit, but you're gonna be still there. You're gonna be right there, and that's what a lot of people understand that this thing called life in easy. It's never been easy. It's never gonna be easy. So if anybody thinks it's gonna be easy, you can forget. You might just chalk it up right now no, it's not gonna be easy, he's for losers. What's up? Hello, we could not be the people we are. If it was easy, yeah, we would not be here have this conversation.

T: 53:08

Yeah, it was. If I want to ease it easy no, born life, life is born and busy, so yeah.

M: 53:22

Yes, it's like, oh god, no, and I'm gonna say this also there are gonna be some relationships, my people, that you may have to cut them off. You may have to come off like a disease, lim, because if that relationship is detrimental to your mental health and your moral health, you have to let them go. And again, it's gonna be hard, it's gonna be difficult, but it's for your own good, it's not for their good, it's for you. You have to be the one to be healthy. You're the one who had to live on your morals. You don't want to be ten toes down and believe and stand firm. If that person ain't that, you ain't got a customer I got do anything I lead, just leave.

T: 54:03

Okay, say they just leave, because Like I mean a blur to dole out like that. But don't kind of wait for relationships. But if your relationship does Challenge you know you're, your morals, that's one thing. But if you're within a marriage and you feel like you know it's just not going your way or your morals are being challenged, you have to consider what literally bought you there from the first place. And you got it. You know I'm gonna do the work. You got to be still, or you know you got them. Yeah, take your time when you move, because Hasty movements don't get us anywhere either. Right?

T: 54:46

No that's part of morals also, is you know the time that you sit with things right?

T: 54:53

We're probably talking to think before we talk, right, and so you want to think before you put some things into action. But no one should be unhappy. But you also want to be mindful that Moving Around isn't necessarily that thing that's gonna make you happy, right? Sometimes miss some things when choosing your mate and if you move too quick, you don't have time enough to reflect and what it is that made you choose that mate or perhaps made you stay in that relationship so where you didn't feel the respect that you needed, or perhaps make choices that perhaps you didn't want to make, or made you Compromise pieces of your spiritual self or just any piece of yourself. So you got to sit back and think about those things. But, but indeed, you know, don't not move accordingly.

M: 55:51

Yeah, I swear you. You, you can always encapsulate an entire beating, the entire concept Contire podcast. Just like, all of a sudden, this is like Hmm, how do you, how do we wrap this up? And you just like prove boom as into a nice ball with a little ball on it, and I swear it. This is one of those conversations that it had to be had, because we're seeing moral decay, morality decaying, morality formed by the wayside and when that happens, we no longer become a functioning society. He's become a Society of anarchists and you got to have rules. You have to live by certain rules. Everybody should have a certain rule that you live by, certain things that you just gonna stand 10th toes deep in yeah and being Morally, having a moral compass, is the key.

M: 56:49

You got to have more compass because you don't have that, you will do anything and, as we see in society in general, people do anything. So, it's important to instill in our kids. We asked you have to instill in your kids and you have to be the one because, again, as T said before, if you do not personally install in their kid, somebody else's moral compass will be installed in that kid and you probably won't like how that ends up for you. You won't.

T: 57:19

But I mean it could be your grandma, your kid, out there acting old now. Yeah.

M: 57:25

Yeah, you absolutely got there right and that can very well happen to happens all the time now. So again, people Again, just get your moral compass straight before you go out there and go for anything where there's jobs, relationships, personal growth, anything. Just get that straight and then make sure your kids yeah, but keep it straight.

T: 57:46

Once you got it straight, keep it straight, don't let anyone else challenge it. I.

M: 57:50

Can't say no more, and with that one I'm gonna end this episode on the mic with the M Auntie listen y'all Subscribe button. Like the channel a little bell so you can get the next podcast coming out. Until then, people stay safe. And these and blesses to you, you, you, you, you, you or you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, swinging you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you hear me. You know you call me when I hear you.