Ever thought about how hard truth like prenuptial agreements can actually protect, not doom your relationship? Or wondered why communication and understanding power dynamics can make or break a bond? Join us as we unfold these subjects with raw honesty. We delve into the necessity of prenuptial agreements, especially when there's an uneven net worth between partners. Rather than viewing it as a negative foreshadowing element, we argue that it can be seen as a smart, respectful way to protect oneself financially.
Stepping beyond the financial aspects, we also dissect the intricate facets of relationships. From tackling gender dynamics to overcoming communication hurdles, we unearth the importance of understanding your needs and conveying them effectively in your relationship. Our discussions also hover over some of the harsh realities of dating, especially the contrasting experiences of men and women. We bring to light the predicaments faced by older individuals in finding romance and how self-discovery and friendship can pave the way.
In our candid conversation, we also explore how the physicality of a person can shape our relationships and why it shouldn't dictate our worth. A relationship is not just about the present, but also about recognizing the potential in your partner. It's not just about sailing through smooth times but also about tackling life's unexpected challenges with maturity. Join us in this insightful exploration of love, relationships, and everything that lies in-between.
Go to http://www.overcometoobecome.com to see all of the Video Podcasts and the other podcasts under the "Overcome 2 Become" YouTube Channel
Follow M at @overcometoobecome and T at @tress_city on Instagram
Email us at overcometoobecome@gmail.com for thoughts, comments and show suggestions. Come join the discussion
Ever thought about how hard truth like prenuptial agreements can actually protect, not doom your relationship? Or wondered why communication and understanding power dynamics can make or break a bond? Join us as we unfold these subjects with raw honesty. We delve into the necessity of prenuptial agreements, especially when there's an uneven net worth between partners. Rather than viewing it as a negative foreshadowing element, we argue that it can be seen as a smart, respectful way to protect oneself financially.
Stepping beyond the financial aspects, we also dissect the intricate facets of relationships. From tackling gender dynamics to overcoming communication hurdles, we unearth the importance of understanding your needs and conveying them effectively in your relationship. Our discussions also hover over some of the harsh realities of dating, especially the contrasting experiences of men and women. We bring to light the predicaments faced by older individuals in finding romance and how self-discovery and friendship can pave the way.
In our candid conversation, we also explore how the physicality of a person can shape our relationships and why it shouldn't dictate our worth. A relationship is not just about the present, but also about recognizing the potential in your partner. It's not just about sailing through smooth times but also about tackling life's unexpected challenges with maturity. Join us in this insightful exploration of love, relationships, and everything that lies in-between.
Go to http://www.overcometoobecome.com to see all of the Video Podcasts and the other podcasts under the "Overcome 2 Become" YouTube Channel
Follow M at @overcometoobecome and T at @tress_city on Instagram
Email us at overcometoobecome@gmail.com for thoughts, comments and show suggestions. Come join the discussion
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to on the mic with M
T:And T
M:Listen, thank you, and I say this because we have had a tremendous amount of growth in the past month. I mean, we got record views, we got new subscribers, we I appreciate you all because, again, we've been sitting here for over a year just trying to drop some knowledge to you guys about how to make your lives better and to think about how to make your lives better, and obviously we're connecting to you and that's great. So I want to thank you guys and we're going to continue to keep doing this Until. And by saying that, I'm going to talk about the one particular question that has just taken off. It literally had 20,000 views and well over 400 comments. It was about pre enough and I didn't think we didn't think it was going to cause that much of a hoot, but it has and it continues that even today and that's been a week ago and it's still, to this day, still racking up a whole bunch of views and comments.
M:So I just want to, you know, jump on that particular discussion first about, you know, pre numbs and how we really feel about pre numbs. I mean, we mentioned a little bit on that particular short, but I heard it from, I heard it from comments from hell. Now I get any sound of pre no to. I'm going to sign anything he puts in front of me. To what? What about my side and your side and everybody else's side, and what?
T:about it hey this is your side Exposed, let's do it, have that conversation.
M:Let's, let's go there and we're going to talk about other things, but we're going to definitely talk about this, the one with the pre no, pre, nobs. Now for us, for me, for me. I think that if you come into a relationship with something somebody comes in with, let's say, let's say you came in a T with a relationship with millions of dollars.
Mac Da Don:You you.
M:You're Rihanna and I'm BC Rocky.
T:Hello, knock off version.
M:Yeah knock off version. Okay, so if I come in there and I'm like listen, you know we're talking, we're going back and forth, that's you know what I think I want marry you Now. If Rihanna says accepts it, I guarantee she should be in the lawyer's office getting some paperwork done, just in case, down the road, he wants to. You know, ab Rocky decided to do something different.
T:Absolutely. I mean, you're just going to take 50% of the everything, like because the law said so and we didn't build the 50% Like we didn't even have a chance to know later on in life, exactly, exactly. To me, the prenuptial agreement is more respectful than putting all your assets in your mom's name and then, when shit hits the fan you know you're like, oh, you're not nothing, nothing.
Mac Da Don:No, but it's definitely more clever.
T:I mean it's more mature, it's more mature, it's more mature.
Mac Da Don:Hey look, if you don't want to sign a prenuptial, then don't be surprised when you put everything in his own name or go his separate way, or God you know, that's what I would assume.
T:Like, if we don't come up with more than if we don't sign the prenuptial, if we don't come up with something that we can agree right, a prenuptial agreement that we can agree to, right. Then let's go out several ways then, because clearly we both came to the table to be married, right?
M:Absolutely.
T:And so then, let's go find our forever partners then, because clearly you're not it, because clearly you're valuing something more than that which I'm valuing right.
M:Very true. But then if I'm a guy who understands that marriage nowadays is 50 percent and I 50 percent, after you get a divorce, it may survive. It's a 50 percent chance that it continue over. I'm going to do one better.
Mac Da Don:Marriage is a 50-50 shot that you guys survive right. On top of that, women account for 70 percent of the divorces.
T:Proceedings.
Mac Da Don:They file stuff.
T:They don't account for it. We can't you file for it.
Mac Da Don:Yeah.
T:It's not the same. Now I'm not going to say that I'm saying, the point still stands.
Mac Da Don:if I know, as a guy, that marriage is 50 percent and that 50 percent 70 percent of the time is women who are trying to get out of the divorce, then yeah, you would be a fool to not protect yourself. Who the fuck drives a car without insurance? First off, if you can afford insurance and you drive a car without insurance, you're a fool. Absolutely You're a fool. Anyone would think that.
M:Yeah.
Mac Da Don:They don't let you get in an 18-1 without insurance. That is true, right, if you travel overseas, you put insurance on your packages, on your luggage, if you can, because you're traveling overseas.
M:This will guarantee you get your luggage.
Mac Da Don:Absolutely so. Why is it that the one insurance that we have on marriage, which are prenuptial agreements, seem to be so catastrophic? It blows up relationships because people feel like, oh, you're preparing for the end. I've always heard that like oh, it's preparing for the end, it's being honest about the situation that we're in. Right, that's like me saying I don't know how to swim, but fuck it, I look like a bitch wearing a damn life vest.
M:That's true. That's a good point. You're put to stone too.
Mac Da Don:Damn he should be.
M:He was like a real good when he was out there drowning and getting good.
T:I mean because the end of what happens is everybody's emotions are flaring at the end or in the middle, at whatever point. And what happens when the marriage is just there and we don't actually know which direction anything is going in, you start acting a certain type of way, you start treating each other a certain type of way, you start telling people what you want to do and what you're not going to do, because you don't really know what the judge is going to do with the assets and the things that you all have accumulated, or what you have Right.
T:So, you start treating people like trash. And then that other person's like oh my God, he's going to take the house away from girl. He can't do that, but you don't even know that Y'all don't have no agreement. You don't understand how the law works. People are walking into marriages blind. That's basically what we're speaking to.
T:The idea that you are not walking into an agreement that has a very high chance Failure rate. You know, super blind, yes, and who's ever like in their feelings? Now, a generation from now? Right, which is your child? Perhaps they're in that situation and they won't be the same sex as you, right?
M:Absolutely.
T:And what happens, you know, if my child, you know, wanted to always be a big time, you know, rap star or big time football player, whatever, make it big.
M:Right.
T:Do I not want for my kid, when they find their significant other, to be protected if something happens, especially if he didn't cause that thing to happen?
M:Exactly.
T:Because that's basically what you know. You would assume the prenuptial agreement would protect you know each other from.
M:Yes.
T:And then he goes off and he has a whole another family. But he's over here, you know, taking care of me and my mom and all of our children. You know he just can't up and leave and take all of his money and try to take care of a whole another family and act like. You know my mother don't exist.
M:Yes.
T:You've been taking care of my mom, you know, for the last 15 years and then, because you got a whole new family, you're just going to up and no, let's all lie some things here in this.
M:See, and you know, you know how new women are and you know they don't know where you came from. I don't think you got three kids.
T:Oh, they don't know. First off, I was the new woman. I wouldn't care neither, just like just keeping it real. Because why would I care about something that you're able to just shut off from, like you wasn't caring about them? Where we have?
M:See the last thing.
T:So you're not about to come to me now when you supposed to be my everything and I'm trying to take all of your assets. You know everything that you have to make my life now Great. I'm not going to be pressed for you to say, now I go send half of that back home so I can get, you know now, half the size house that I wanted. Like that's a crazy concept. So, absolutely, the new woman is going to absolutely not give a damn about the last thing because she's not supposed to.
M:No, because this is my world now.
T:Yes.
M:So it's like my world.
Mac Da Don:And I think the interesting part to me of this conversation is always the feeling, I guess, that people get upset, that somebody wants to protect themselves. But what you feel to realize is that when you guys get into a marriage, that is, like I, theoretically speaking the apex of how you all feel with each other. That's when y'all feel the best about each other, theoretically speaking, ideally when y'all get married you should be sitting there thinking like that's the one for me, that's perfect.
Mac Da Don:At that point, why would you not set up clauses to ensure that, when this is the exact opposite, that you still treated me as though you gave a fuck about?
T:Because it's still to realize that's the only time, Because that's what when you get to the stage of a marriage to divorce.
Mac Da Don:I don't do a fuck about the next thing. So therefore, I'm going to treat you like anything. Mike's versus you and your family, your kids, everybody.
T:Maybe his kids too.
M:But then your kids now? But no, it's your kids now, or your kids now, or maybe they're not my kids.
T:Listen. No, you've been provided for them. The law says that if you had been provided for them, ok what Dana said.
M:But yeah, but that's the thing Everybody keeps thinking. It's going to be hunky-dory, it's that, believe it or not, once you get married. That's just the beginning. Yeah, because you're going to evolve, change.
T:You're not going to like them. No, this day you can't be down with somebody for 20 years and have liked them throughout the whole 20. No, it's impossible, At least one good weekend where he offended you and you was like I mean, I don't like him. Right now, I'm going to need a minute, I'm going to need to go to grandma's house. We got a sip of milk tea with grandma, yeah, you know what I'm saying, I'm going to offend it here. I'm deeply offended right now. I got to go.
M:I'm going to go outside and smoke a cigar. I'm going to walk around, keep walking into the cigar, about that big and I'm like OK, now I can go.
T:And that's when we know that we offended y'all because the cigar didn't got too small. You burned your little finger.
M:But you know I'm down here. I almost got a pen.
T:But that's the thing I think he mad I'll leave daddy alone.
M:I think he mad man. This and again. We understand it because we're adults and I don't know why people think that somehow. Oh, we're going to be the same, you're not going to be the same.
T:Oh, the type From the time you marry and people are like, oh, this is the best.
M:Somebody once said to me I looked at the wedding picture and he said that's the greatest day in my life. I said if, that's the wedding day. It's the greatest day in my life and that's my apex of my entire life. Is this day here? I say if that's your best day, be prepared to get a divorce, because that means you stop doing. You're going to stop doing everything that got you that point. Because we're here.
T:Trying to outdo the memories and the yeah. You're supposed to live it up. It's the beginning.
M:Because you're going to grow old together, you're going to do things differently together because you're now a teen. So I'm like, hmm, what if she going to date, we're going to hang out together? And she's saying, what if he'll stay with me? You got married, you said as a union.
T:Y'all know how we try to move and maneuver and it doesn't bother you after a certain time, absolutely I know you're going to get up first thing in the morning. I'm going to sleep in lazily. You're going to turn the lights on. I'm going to just pull the covers over my head. You're going to get the clanking clanking. It's not going to bother me because.
M:I'm going to be snoozing, exactly. I'm not going to bother you, I'm going to let you sleep, because why am I going to be up?
T:You'll probably go out to get some breakfast. I'm going to sleep until lunchtime. It's fine, you're OK with that. That's your time to yourself.
M:Absolutely and.
T:I'm OK with sleeping.
M:Yes, and a lot of people don't look at this as a fairy tale. Marriage is not a fairy tale. Marriage is work and it's the hard head work. That's not that I turn it on and turn it off when I need to. No, no, you have to work hard to be here, to be married almost 20 years in your case, in me, almost 30 years. It takes work.
T:Yeah, no, and sometimes it's like, yeah, just stop doing the work, just stop working, just stop.
M:Just be still, yes, just be still. And that's what a lot of people understand.
T:So don't go file for the divorce. No, just say no.
M:Work this shit out.
T:You're married for two years and you had the worst violence inside the courthouse. No, this is the time to be still. You're only married for two years. You can't run and go get a marriage. You can't your marriage nullified.
Mac Da Don:I just feel like people think you get married and all of a sudden shit's supposed to just be like you on a fucking so far he trip and you just out just exploring and having great times at big fun. That might be a random Saturday in July, if you're lucky. You have to be okay with that. Marriage is almost boring, like when I was looking in there. It's just boring, but that means it's secure. If you're just boring, you might want to say like okay, like that's good, I wake up every day, I know what he does, I know what she does, I know what I'm about to expect. Why is that a problem for people? People like our friends and like oh, like we're born, like it's the same routine every day, like yeah, because that's called security.
T:No, the idea of staying busy, this idea that we got to stay busy now. You know, every other Sunday I got to go to the ladies front. You know I gotta be doing something. Or you know you got to go to the sports party catch the game, sit down.
T:Yeah, and invite some people over to. You want to go to brunch every other Sunday, but you don't want to host no brunch. Yeah, that's the problem for now. Grandma don't get to come over, mom don't get to come over and see the kids. No, you ain't seen aunties in a month of Sundays. Yeah, y'all don't host nothing. Nobody gets together anymore, and you talking about some something's boring. Now stuff gonna pop off when you know.
M:That is true, and that's the other thing is like they always think something has to happen. You can be quiet because the something happening was the dating part of it. Yep Cuz it put you for the whole time until y'all really got to that point I really know each other.
M:No y'all really know what you. Everybody said to well, she looked good today. Did you ever see when she woke up first of the morning? No, her face ain't so made up. No, did you ever see her here? She ever see you. When you got me, you ain't looking so sexy, but you little beard all over the place because you went to sleep and calling your eye on all that stuff. Did you ever see how you react to certain things? Don't go your way.
T:Yeah, cuz that's when you're real ugly.
M:Very ugly.
T:Yeah, man man man and the woman In an angry man or angry woman damn.
M:Yes, it's not a good thing.
T:You're like yes okay, no, I didn't. He's not even gonna stop.
M:Okay, no, I don't like it See and that because you were playing miss good the whole time, because you're trying to get to the end.
T:Yeah, and you're not trying to expose your ugly side. No, cuz you already know was ugly. I already know as soon as he brought me the wrong way. I gotta act like what he gonna make me act like that. That's what he about to do. I don't Did not want this part of me to come out, ever, ever ever right ever. And then here we are on month five and he tried to take me there. Here we are, yeah.
M:Yeah.
T:I'm just stand on the outside of the restaurant, I'm gonna show my whole ass. You know those little things that kind of sparked those. You know Each person.
M:You're overlooking the beginning, cuz again, we're going through this whole. Yeah, you know, I want to get on them and all this stuff. But that's the problem. The problem in today's society is everybody wants to be perfect, but we also. We said before, everybody ain't perfect.
T:Nobody's gonna be perfect. Yeah, you don't want to be perfect. No, this is the idea of it but you don't give the reality though.
M:Now because you, I'm not gonna say, I'm not gonna say and after I'm not gonna say there's a whole lot of shit, the closet I don't want to say but you don't want, nobody see, because you know we're trying to get to that point One way. The other.
T:That's why I take some years to take some time to get to me, cuz you actually have to get those things out of each other. Like you, you do want to see your guy is. You know? I'm not to some say you don't want to push this buttons to where he's mad man, but you do want to see your guy when he's yeah, I would say that.
Mac Da Don:No, it's the worst thing that's.
T:I'm good on the worst. I'm just gonna take them there. No, you can take a woman to a worse perhaps. Okay, fine, we'll all survive that. But, I'm not seeing no man. I want to see him angry, but not at his words.
M:Oh yeah, it's worse. Yeah, and now I'm talking human. I even know what that that?
Mac Da Don:Women will be the first thing that pushes him to his worst version of himself not the worst version of.
T:Oh yeah but pushes him, pushes his buttons. Women can push.
Mac Da Don:Know many guys who like lose their temper to other guys.
M:You're not gonna think nothing like this is not even in my fucking level exactly but your girl oh.
M:You know, and a lot of guys, a lot of people don't understand that because you're trying to get to this Mythical part of we could go through our entire lives and probably get married and just have a wonderful life. No, there are two separate people with their own distinctive issues, trying to come together and live in harmony together as a team People. I can't believe she was like that. Well, obviously you didn't spend enough time. They really question certain things about it, like I didn't know she was this way. Oh, I didn't know she believed that.
T:I didn't know he was even doing that. What are you talking about? Where were you at? I'm just saying, be all up in that man business in space, but you just didn't have no clues on what your significant other was doing. It's just very hard to believe and it happens all the time.
M:People are dropping each other like flies down because they're finding out things they didn't know about but didn't like about them or whatever. I'm thinking we're dating for years. You didn't know this shit. I don't say how you date somebody 10, 12, 15 years.
Mac Da Don:I don't know how you date somebody 10, 12, 15 years, I ain't know she had I ain't know whenever she got there, like that she was actually gonna put the gun to my head, like.
T:First I was gonna go next thing. You know she was had a nice stomach. I was kind of like that's Just start talking about.
Mac Da Don:If that happens now, you know, with an insane individual, right, you met somebody who's insane, who just choked you off. Oh, the woman. You know, you know that woman needs to go underneath the.
M:People are so so twisted up in their head because it has this fake ass impression of dating marriage relationships, all of that, yeah, and the thing is he listed? Dumb motherfuckers who never had a healthy relationship. And gonna listen to them talk about you? They know my fucks a married. Yep and never been married, probably had 35 girlfriends, and he gonna tell you how you should have a successful relationship.
T:The fuck he can't know what not to do. That's all you can teach. He's like don't do this.
M:Do this and you won't end up like I am, so you didn't stop listening people thinking I can do better or it can't happen to me. The other thing I hear a lot or that's them that can happen to me.
Mac Da Don:Oh yeah, I can, or I think people learn a lot from people who discuss dating. So You'll, a lot of big podcasts will be a bunch of single men or single women. Ain't never been.
T:It's weird, yeah, single men, single women.
Mac Da Don:They be real telling you how to, how to raise up, how to.
T:Women be toxic. How women be toxic they masculine, masculine energy for the women and feminine energy for the men Just don't they say all that?
Mac Da Don:The thing is that people listen to that because that's where they are. Like I'm in dealing with this shit, so you listen to things that you can mesmerize with your yes people when your podcast becomes your yes people.
T:You know that's not like appropriate behavior. You know you putting too much on your woman and on that feminine energy that she had in the first five years of relationship has now shifted into that Masculine energy right, that toxic masculine energy you know that you want to talk about because you ain't give your man proper respect or a proper meal. Like that's not toxic masculine, that's that man is mad, he's hungry, he's hungry. They're probably be working hard all day like I'm gonna get some man. He's hungry, hungry as hell.
M:Yeah, fix some of uh uh uh chicken or some rotisserie chicken. But and then fail to see that, like I don't know why, he's mad.
Mac Da Don:I, or like they feel like it's a people, feel like it's a task, like oh, I gotta just do this other thing for someone. It says wow Me what I think, what we're trying to enumerate, is A act of of love.
T:Yeah, yeah, you do have to do it. Feel like loving them, you still gotta feel like cooking for me.
M:Yes, they didn't do that. Well, here's his food. Yeah, and if it's?
T:not a pleasure for you to cook, like for your man, then I don't know what we're like, what are the pleasures that you have for him? Because it's like I want my man to have pleasure in like doing nice things for me. That's what I would want, Right? I don't want you to draw a bath for me and be like I'm turning these knobs for Samara. Keep turning. You know, making her a bath, I sprinkle all this stuff. She wants some candles, like what? Yes? Or the food salty, because you mad at it's that.
T:Now you want me to cook, so now you sprinkle in the salt and extra heavy, you burn this stuff, because you don't fell asleep on the couch because you was mad, as opposed to Making the things that you do for your significant other, like you know, an active service that's pleasurable to you. Like, nah, I enjoy cooking for this man because he's gonna smile and make me feel like heaven. You know when he's eating it. Look at him. Yes, eating that food like that that I made. Yeah, just scrape that plate. Yes, do you see what you're gonna say to your head?
M:like go ahead and scrape that plate. Yeah, I did that. I'm giving, I'm doing something for you, to show you my appreciation and again, because I want you and it's gonna be without you even thinking about it, right Cause normally Men don't gotta do much, right?
T:they gonna take care of you regardless with that check, right? No, I'm about to go get my nails and I'm about to pay all these bills. I'm about to go get this little car detail because I'm not vacuuming this out, because my man takes care of me. Right so why would I not want to reciprocate? Because that's what takes care of me.
Mac Da Don:You know. What I also enjoy, though, is that, whenever we have this discussion, there's always gonna be somebody in the comment section and forgive me if this is you, um who will sit there and complain about how they niggas don't do they niggas don't do they, they girl don't do, they girl Don't do, and we're not talking to you.
T:I'm in a hum, dispec?
Mac Da Don:we're not. No, because you are in a shitty relationship. You're a bitch don't give a fuck about me.
T:I mean, yeah, you're, I'm not talking to you.
Mac Da Don:Yes, I'm not talking to the person who doesn't, who's in a terrible relationship With their spouse. Every time he get mad at you. Now you can't not. Not, your gas ain't got no.
Mac Da Don:Now every time he manage you, you can't get your hair done. Yeah, that's how she managed you the food or something. We're not talking to you. You know I should be hearing this and thinking damn, if I have to go out of my way in my own relationship to treat the person who I chronofo love like shit, because I feel some type of way that should be enough to tell you that you'll love that niggas, because I cannot like somebody in my life, but I'm not going to treat them like shit, especially if I think that they're important to me.
T:If you love somebody and they're important to you and they don't value you or they can't give you the things that you require of them, you, it's time to carry on. Oh well, I mean, you gotta move on, because I require a, b and c and you require x, y and z. Now I don't have a problem with giving you what you require, right, but you have a problem feeding into me right Now.
T:I'm mad he should be, giving you the shit that you need. Like Nothing can go well here, because after a while now you mad because oh, she done burnt the damn toast again. How the hell you burn toast? She hit burning bull of eggs, petty stuff. That's not how you get the ball rolling in the positive direction. You know, at some point you just you just gotta throw that, throw it in. I'll do it. If he do it, that's dumb.
Mac Da Don:You're not gonna do it yeah.
M:I think we started out before you just talk on, do it.
Mac Da Don:If you're Just contingent upon someone else doing that, doing something completely different, you're not gonna do it yeah, he buys really Kills me is this still these, these lousy sums of bitches?
M:and they complain. You know I'll be with him for 10, 15, 20 years. He's still the same person.
T:Yeah, like, so what the fuck.
M:You still you. You don't want to waste your 20 years with this motherfucker. Why am I supposed to be like? Oh girl, no, you're full Like and I've reversed as a guy. Yeah, I'll be worth for 20 years. She's still in cooking.
T:No, for the men love that. They love to have a woman they giving they or I cannot Like. I hate it. I'm sorry, it's something about me. I do not like caring a man being in the relationship and he's getting taken advantage of. You know how many women would die to have you and take care of you properly. Just slap them right beside they.
M:Get out of here. They never leave, though.
T:They just complain and complain. I'm just like.
Mac Da Don:I this because this is cool.
T:Yeah, so this thing I could complain about okay, and that's a lot of complain about things that you don't have.
Mac Da Don:But, like you said, like if you, if you are a guy, you are taking care of your business and you are, you know, like, saving your money, you do want to keep care your woman your woman's not the one feeding back until you gotta go women if you don't want to Want to feed your man and cook for you and clean for your man and your nigga, not even Giving you money to do shit, even though y'all both work, let's see y'all both work you got your money, but he stops in that same big Because.
Mac Da Don:Look you, you make my every. Every nigga who's worth a damn will tell you if you make my life easier, you always gonna be on top, absolutely.
T:You.
Mac Da Don:If I come home and sit down my house, the same way was when I walked out the door.
M:Awesome.
Mac Da Don:Yeah, I ain't got worry about, like my house, catcher fire because she she makes sure, like you know, the cows get blown on that night.
T:I'm a seriously. You always have underwear in your underwear drawer because she get.
Mac Da Don:New shirts in your closet, cuz she don't want shopping. Yeah, I don't know a single guy who's gonna complain about that. No, and peace.
M:Women, we would love peace. He gonna take care of you because that dude's gonna come. He's gonna take care.
T:The other part is that you, you, you, better make the proper Requirement to be taken care of the way that you need to be taken care of no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Mac Da Don:Before you say anything, repeat that one more time, because people don't pay attention to that.
T:You have to make the proper requirement Right of him to take care of you how you want to be taken care of, like you just can't be subtle and for like any old thing and then be mad as hell that he didn't do what you really wanted but he don't even really know oh.
T:Because, yeah, we'd be out there, like I mean, he just got me the small ring. I kind of wanted the big ring, but I told him I'd take whatever type of ring. So you know, like, but it's okay, it's you be any films for 10 years. And then the whole giant relation, a whole giant argument coming. I thought you didn't even give a damn about got you that ring. And then we went on vacation and I pay for your parents, like why didn't you say you wanted a big hold on?
Mac Da Don:but by the same token, you also want sit there and say oh, you took me and my parents on vacation.
T:Yeah, no, you just not hold on. Just the ring is small.
Mac Da Don:Yeah, yeah, but if I told you okay, what a man that we wouldn't have done this yeah and that's logically speaking. Oh yeah like, okay, I put one in the ring, so now you're not gonna go on vacation.
T:You have to be honest about what it is that you need, because for the most part, a lot of men are Inverable about what they need. Right, we just kind of rise to the occasion right before the woman. That's not, that's not kind of like what the man's role is Occasion to make your day easy.
M:Okay.
T:You know sitting on. Yeah, we go to your person be like oh, I think this mascara running low. Let me go to alter and pick over a new man.
M:Why would do is, like him in here's credit card go. A lot of people don't even know what they need. They think they know what they need, but they really don't know. You know a lot of people. You said what are you looking for? A relationship? Mm-hmm. A lot of them have topped their head thinking money, that's really not what you need.
T:That's what we got to have value man from. That's what we got there cuz nobody really knows what they wanted. So they was like I need a man who make 200,000.
Mac Da Don:Get out later.
T:Not to spend the money. So all these young girls who was okay with Samuel, show y'all, didn't shot these girls down. That's not fair. Y'all know. They know what they was talking about. They don't know how the money gonna stretch oh.
M:Lordy, who's teaching them?
T:No one, no one.
M:This is not taught and let me say something to the people out there, something I found out this weekend. If you're, if you're looking for a six foot man, make six figures great body, sense of humor and. You know, just can get on with the world.
T:Oh, he's outgoing, he's outgoing. Yeah, oh, that's a nice guy.
M:You know it's less than 1% of the male population. Now, yes, so when you have women, talk about six figures automatically. You look at, that's such a small percentage that you can't measure it. So you need to say I need a guy first of all who has the potential of Doing good things and be able to take himself be, able to take care of me and if we get together, his family, just do that.
M:but to look for a guy who's six feet six, I'm just one is six foot man, a specialty store like type of.
Mac Da Don:I'll show you love Forgive me for this sentence, but there'll be a wonderful individual who will sit there and say oh, I really want me a man who is six feet, six feet above what we want me to think, who's five nights, almost an a ain't gonna work. I don't want no short nigga. I don't feel safe for the short nigga, right.
T:I.
Mac Da Don:Know, sure, dude, he, they were like that. I love me a tall girl yeah.
M:Yeah, oh my god.
Mac Da Don:Love tall girls. You know taller women, but they just the tall women, the same ones who look at my one Short, short ass. But my question is like why y'all niggas really late in Aesthetic fuck up what could be a good life, like you are here saying that because of something that you cannot control? I'm not saying you need to be a skinny girl dating a fat dick. I'm not saying you need to be a fat guy Did another fat girl. I'm not saying you need to be a skinny guy dating a skinny girl. I'm not saying that because that way you can control.
T:I can't control how tall I am Right I cannot control that.
Mac Da Don:I'm not about to go get the system put in my knees, but they did all South Park.
T:I'm not getting my.
Mac Da Don:Metal in my kneecaps just because I got. I'm short, then they painted bone stretches, exactly your knees are gonna be no good, no better than fucking kitty Smith.
M:Yeah, not me. There's a motherfucker.
Mac Da Don:But you tall.
T:But that's true. Though you let the aesthetics Allow you to mark people off the list. Like you keep somebody on the list, we don't have a job longer than you keep a shot. Not, you date the shorter guy, but basically date, get to know people, not with sex, no benefits, that's not dating. No, that's not dating guys.
M:No, it's not everybody knows.
T:Yes you're having sex with someone like, the woman's confused. So if you're spotted out With another woman and her homegirl, see you, she's under feeling, dating with benefits and now she's not figured why you still dated bitch because he's supposed to. You wasn't supposed to be doing to do yeah but she did, and now you know. You're in your feelings and that's why you can't, because the woman don't, don't. You know, can't really quite process too well.
M:Right some can.
T:I don't even know if you want to consider those, though that's that's scary yeah but for the most part you know you really shouldn't be dating with benefits. No, it messes. It messes up all types of things. It does.
M:because here's a thing if you keep giving me the milk, yeah and after a while I'm like she want me to do this and then you kind of back off what I'm all getting your milk and you want me to do more right Because. This is gonna make me my mind.
T:Okay yes, I'm saying like to you, we're dating to me, we go together. Yeah, I got her neck. Yeah, so by the time I gave up my body, we go together. By the time you didn't gave up your paycheck and now you only got like 35 dollars for gas for the week, you know, yeah, we go together. Yeah, let's you not act accordingly then? Because why would I act accordingly? Like I just thought she was paying my rent, because I thought that you know you had it like that and you know we was just dating. I thought you gave all your girlfriends, you know. Well, you know, I thought we go together cuz I just gave you my whole body and I thought like then you just shoot the club up. And you're like I kind of shoot the club up.
T:Because again it's hard to date with and and the benefits is is the rent being paid? Yes, the benefits is the body. Yes, so the idea that you're dating with all of these benefits. It's gonna be hard to kind of start looking through the pool properly, yeah, to see what's good and what's not good, because you've given away so many benefits. So now we're all confused. Yeah, because I thought we been go together, but you kind of go together with a few people, cuz you was laying down with a few of them.
M:You're West Coast. Yeah, I got my East Coast from Midwest my dirty self.
T:Yeah, I got my little visitator visit. Yeah, we're trying to come every so often, yeah.
M:So how do we get there?
T:because we started mixing in those benefits.
M:Nobody had a conversation. Like you know, baby, I really well again, if I'm a guy, I'm not gonna say, well, you want a few, because at that point I can't get.
T:It becomes very like complex cuz. We're lying you know, more than just dating. Now we're lying to each other, deceiving.
Mac Da Don:I think, but I think it's even. I'll go one step further and say everyone's dating with, with the idea what can this person provide for me?
T:yeah, right.
Mac Da Don:I need to see what she's gonna provide to me if I was considered committing to you fully. It never was a test drive, right I'm not really sure if I want to buy this car. So let me see what the car can do. Let me get in the car behind the wheel, turn the knob, see what the dash looks like like. You want to be able to kind of turn the car inside out a little bit. You know your test out to really see what you bought to buy.
Mac Da Don:But the thing is that's people yes not cars people you can't test drive everything that that person can provide for you in the dating phase, because things, certain things shouldn't come out to you. Get married yes, I'm gonna be risque.
T:You cannot like you know, gonna see somebody pushed to their limit in each season. You might see me sad, you might see me happy, but you ain't gonna see me in extreme sadness, right no, I'm gonna see me in extreme situations. It's gonna take time for life to put us into those challenge phases but you actually see like now my man down, hold on, we stand down for long.
T:Let me flex a little something like now. Now he about to see me in my greatness about the carry this whole situation right, whoa, I know she was capable of that absolutely oh shoot, baby girl went all the way down, babe. You know she just had a baby. You know she can't do nothing or she on bed rest.
T:Some women going better yes, you imagine your girl on bed rest and it was a two-income household. She went on bed rest at three months in and I ain't expecting that to about the eighth month some households yeah, man put on his boots. He say now I got two jobs now there you go there's been gonna rise some women. They were gonna rise to the occasion, but life not gonna put you in those challenge situations until sometime they come.
M:TS, so damn true. And the other thing is, people need to look at people for who they are, not for what they think they are all.
T:That's especially the potential, because I love to look at the potential because I got lots of potential, but damn potential at 40 is dumb dumb that's a damn that you should have been going see him.
M:Yeah, I used to day him when he was 25 he had a potential. See, look he, 40, ain't got a potential but you don't say we were in the guest house 25 we 40. We still the same spot where we're gonna get there slowly, but show they gonna get there where retirement or death, which one you're gonna get to faster?
T:that's the relationships. That's not thriving.
M:You just in it and you just that's all over and people don't realize that there's still those relationships. And then it gets so invested those relationships they can't get out. They only know how to get out because, down to feel guilty, they don't know how to.
T:It's like oh, you can't afford to. Oh, my god, but but damn T, now you do. Literally you can't afford it mm-hmm because what you doing is you're looking at like what does it really take for me, a grown 40 year old man, to live on my own in the area that I'm living?
M:I say anapolis let's call it anapolis huh, he would tell you a grown man living in an apples on his own.
T:Yeah, that's money just see what I'm saying yeah so if you don't have an, and I'm sorry and you're gonna have a little expense now, right? Oh baby girl, baby boy. Right, you might have to get in college by this point yes, so now you? I mean, you might not have child support, but you want to support other people after you paid your household expenses, right?
Mac Da Don:yep, and you ain't gonna start free now. So exactly, so it's the skillet, it's anything with. You sit there and you earn a relationship. Y'all are cool. You come home because you've had two or three kids now you stay at home, mom, you help take them to know them. Kids to school. Life is completely different then. Also, you found out your man been running around. You really don't have a sale on like I'm gonna get the fuck out of nowhere bitch we're job.
T:With what job go even the alimony and the child support. How comfortable is the lifestyle now going to be with just you and your children?
M:wow that's very true.
T:Yeah, cuz it's like look, think about the lifestyles once you come out of these relate, cuz it's more than just you know. I can't stand him right exactly more than that cuz I told you right, if you ain't not been able to stand him for you know minimum of four years in the same house and it's not even valid. You need four miserable years in the same roof before your misery is valid right if you ever come to me.
T:That's what I'm gonna let you know that's not valid if you wasn't mad and miserable for four consecutive at some point should be an upswing.
M:Now, the only thing I can see that would cause that the less than that four years would be drugs, alcohol and abuse oh, yeah, no, yeah, we definitely gonna have some little ways for you to get out of the four yes it's just general, like you just can't stand him his face, you know, all of a sudden he's smell bad because you can't stand him.
T:Like, yeah no, you gotta just sit there for a little bit. With that, it's couples who lived on levels in their homes for decades.
M:This people that knew used to live in living the same room but like Ozzie and Harriet, lucille, different, separate. And then people tell me all kinds of shit. I'm like what, how you live, like that, and you may remember for the eight, nine years and that's how we this, how we function yeah, I see other kids.
Mac Da Don:We got two kids yeah but you remember though, like sleep is come to my in my hands see this completely different than like anything else, right? If you are tired, you automatically are operating at a lower capacity. If your girl like to see what 85,000 covers on the bed, 13 pillows, and like to have a room at 75 degrees, guess what she can see by our goddamn, so she missed one part.
T:She needed down and she like her feet up on your leg. So how I'm gonna go to sleep now with the 85 covers and all the pillows, because I don't have you in there, I don't got your leg, but where's your leg? I need your leg though.
Mac Da Don:In. Meanwhile you're in the other room praying the guy. She can go to sleep. Because that's what? If you step in there, you're not going to bed tonight.
T:But I don't know that. I just needed you know to front my leg upon you.
M:Well see, that's something you should find out early, you know, because, again, if y'all going through the process, when it gets cold. You should know that oh, she likes coming up on me, she likes doing this, she likes doing that. So you would know this is not nothing new, not all of a sudden she's sleeping naked and next you know, you get married.
T:She got the grandma stuff all up and put on, and then they like what the hell is this? She's up like that.
M:No, but these are things that people need to be aware of, but they're so into the physicality, which is important.
T:This is nice, don't get me wrong, it's definitely nice yeah but you have to say outside the bed.
M:The rest of 90% of your time has to be dealing with her outside of the bedroom. So if you can't relate to or talk to or you have nothing in common, then you shouldn't be thinking about it, and that's the other thing. Is people like we see potential? Well, you know, she don't talk that much, but maybe if I hang around long enough she'll talk.
T:I mean, six months and she's still talking maybe like even another year, open to mesmerize by something about her, something, and that's the thing if a girl's fine for us.
M:Well, she's fine. You know, I don't overlook that, because she's fine.
T:Yeah, no, women become mesmerized by men too. Yeah, yeah, that's true. And but then you got to break myself.
M:Okay, let's get out this, this, this mindset that I have to break, that I have to stop being infatuated with him and her and say, okay, take off the glasses.
T:Yeah, I mean make him start checking those boxes, right yes you said you wanted him six feet. Is he six feet? Okay, you don't. He got a little at. You said you wanted him to do this. Do we do that? Mm-hmm, and then so eventually, eventually, if you're marking off your boxes of what you required from a man, the people who you mesmerized by are not gonna hit many boxes. Gonna hit very many boxes that is so true you need to carry on, move on.
M:But it's just like a sense of women don't want to be by themselves.
T:You know why you was in the last relationship.
M:Women don't want to be alone.
T:We have to be Comfortable with the idea that nobody wants to be alone. No man is the lonely out, right?
M:nope.
T:Nope and. Nope but you just can't settle for any old thing and the hopes to not be alone and that's what's happening now.
M:Yeah people are selling for anything. Yeah and then again mad. I can't believe I'm going online and find somebody now. If you think it was bad enough, just meeting someone out here on the street is bad enough, what the hell you think. But pick up the phone and swipe it left and right, gonna find some.
T:I don't think it makes a difference? Okay, the problem is your vetting process. Ah Right, yeah, the problem is your vetting process. Yeah you met somebody at from wherever Did you get to know any of their affiliates other than just themselves? And that's weird to me. You know nobody who they know from way back when, from there to here, like you, you just didn't get to know that person. Mm-hmm, they could have been your home, homey from my school, that you said oh See where this goes. Yeah you shallow still oh.
T:God, you only talk about yourself and you don't really get to dive in to see what this person's at and where they look, what they're looking for and where they're trying to go In life. You shallow, you don't ask them. Do they got nieces? Do they got nephews? You know, is their grandparents still alive? What did your grandmother teach? What did your grandfather teach you? You don't ask anything. You're full of nothing.
M:Good day, that's bad.
Mac Da Don:Relationships in theirs in. As we said before, it's like Like your roller coaster niggas just out here doing shit, like your cosy doing things, instead of learning about each other.
Mac Da Don:Because we're doing things you don't have time to learn, like if I'm sitting here saying, okay, we're going to go to a baseball game. You go to a football game and talk. Then we went to a basketball game, then we went to a movie, then we went to play mini golf. Yeah, the only thing I'm a 45 things I just mentioned was mini golf, that you could possibly have a conversation in the car rides.
T:In the car.
Mac Da Don:That's true, right. So that's very limited conversation. But let's say I put that and I said alright, we went camping and then we went to a park and then we went on or them, or we went on the height Mm-hmm, or we went and we just walked around my neighborhood, mm-hmm. Well, we walked around her neighborhood. Like in those instances, people are afraid to sit in those moments and have conversation, because what you realize is that I ain't got shit to talk about. Yeah, I'm a really boring fucking individual.
T:I can't bounce the conversation back.
Mac Da Don:Oh.
T:I'm nervous to engage in this conversation. See you, you, 35 years old and it's still you, still kind of nervous to engage in the conversation, to give a little bit more. Oh my god like what's what you 42 and you can't carry on the conversation. What are you afraid about being?
Mac Da Don:honest of what your, what your life was like. You're not you like you. If somebody asked you, oh man, how's your childhood? Like people will sit there saying, you know, like there's some good, some bad, or like I hated my kid, my parents are like I hated this, whatever, but like that's the extent, but damn, you ain't got no interest. Like there's no way you can't sit here and tell me like, oh man, you know, growing up I used to enjoy watching blah, blah, blah. Because you're the same age, guess what? I guarantee also the same shit, girl. Yes, so how?
M:you. Why not start the conversation?
Mac Da Don:there. There's so many ways to to actually ingratiate yourself with another individual. If you really just take two six to think about it. What age? What's the age gap?
M:All right.
Mac Da Don:It's a three-year age gap. We probably know the same shit. Mm-hmm, Seven-year age cap. We probably don't know the same.
T:No, we still know the same but there's enough that I know a little. I know it's not Exactly, I know enough about what you do.
Mac Da Don:Yeah, I could fill in the blank. Yeah, if I'm younger, and vice versa. I know I kind of have an idea what came after that.
T:You probably landed around here, type shit, yeah, but it's not hard trying to meet that person or are you trying to be catered to? Because sometimes it sounds like women kind of come to the conversation and it sounds like we lack substance, right, and it's more than we like substances. I did and I want to be catered to. I wouldn't be taken care of. That's not how you are taking care, but I have nothing to damn say like you're not informed.
M:No, no, you're not. Hey, what's your finances? You ain't even interested.
T:You don't even interest yourself.
M:Exactly. Oh, you don't even, you don't even say.
T:I want to talk exactly. I want to talk about myself Like that. I don't do nothing, I have no hobbies.
Mac Da Don:And you'll find a big blow up relationship because of that. Damn, I don't know people who blew up relationships because of that. I'm not interesting, so I just I I stopped talking to him because, like he made me feel bad about myself.
Mac Da Don:Yeah, you feel bad about yourself because you think you're uninteresting. But he was willing, he was doing a lot and he was. But he was also probably willing to figure it out and say like she's probably, she's probably, just don't even think about it. Yes, I'm like, I'm wanting to try to help you figure it out, but you're one of the ghosts because you felt inferior and I want to stay inferior.
T:That's the other part so like when you hear and talk to other people, right, you're, you're kind of figuring how we yeah, like if you're always studying or you're always in the gym, mm-hmm, and I'm just kind of I just want to, I just want to, you know, make sure my hair looks nice and just kind of watch TV, and it just doesn't. The lifestyles don't mesh well.
T:No like you're reading again. I'm trying to turn my ratchet TV up like I don't want that lifestyle, that, whatever it is that you have going on Like a foot somebody who loves football Mm-hmm, I'm not a sports person, I'm just. I just Gonna be hard to be with a sports fanatic if you don't even like watching any of the sports you know, yeah, yeah, I have to see what you like, yeah.
M:I mean you may like a lifetime. I fucking hate lifetime. But if you say you know what today's rainy, snowy outside, let's put a log in a file and look at lifetime.
T:But if I want to watch lifetime 365 days a year, you're like no, no, I don't know, I don't say it's nothing wrong with having things that you have that are yours. Absolutely the match.
Mac Da Don:You want the lifestyles to mesh to a certain extent to a certain extent, yes, but I think innocent of that. Just based on what you just put out, that's a manageable situation. Like you are okay with getting your hair done and and then watch. You sit on watch TV Even first to go out in in exercise. You might not want to do that, but if he's out the one forcing you to go out to the gym and you're not forcing him to come home and guess what, y'all will find Ideally, if you guys want to be together, find a way to amend that so he might say I'm gonna go to the gym Monday, wednesday, friday, right, yeah, and then on Saturday and Sunday I'll go as well, because usually on the week and you work, let's say, or like you hang out with your family, but then these Tuesday and Thursday we do whatever the fuck you want. Vice versa, you can say you know, you go to the gym, I'm a, I'm a, hang out here, I'll be here, we can get here.
Mac Da Don:Mm-hmm and then you show up and then you say, alright, well, what we doing? And we say I watch this time cuz I got to do what I want to do. Now we get to do this thing together, or Y'all figured the fuck out. Well, what are we Tell me? Really, y'all out here after, like, because like we 18, like okay, he, he, he got sports practice and I got a home.
T:So I tell me, guys, what practice is too late for him to come over. So because we can't, we can't be together.
Mac Da Don:My house seven o'clock at night and my mom and dad don't like people be at home at my house past nine, so we don't get a chance, hang out, something done. But you're not 18, y'all be y'all fucking 30s, 40s time on some. He like, he like going to gym four times a week. I don't, I don't work out like that.
T:Because it's also the lifestyle that comes with it that you're also saying that you're not willing to engage in.
M:Absolutely and.
T:I told you to eat different, but he did ask for you to shop a little different for him. Now you like picking up all these help food. I don't need shop like this, right? It's just some women are just not. It's a man, you know. They just don't want you. Yeah, different and.
M:But what's gonna happen is, if they don't change, the other person gonna change for him and they're not gonna be part of that change. Oh, you just end up by yourself and blaming everybody else why you buy yeah oh, you know, the women don't want to do this.
T:Oh, it's all. Just to.
M:You know, masculine feminine, you're masculine, women out, no, no, it's just you, it's just you, you, you know, you just want too much and no one given now and no People need to know who the fuck they are before they out there presenting themselves to the world, because a lot of you go out there present themselves. I'm a guy and I got, I got a dick. Here I am they got a certain age.
T:You should know who you are before you, cuz you know you can't. You can't be like 18, 19, 20, 21, so muscle you know you are before you present yourself to the world.
M:And you wouldn't, because yeah is, you're still trying to find. Yeah, we're 30 and over 30 and 040 50, you tell I'm so I'm trying to find myself my fucking life. Exactly. You lost the fuck. You're looking for it, but I don't have all these bad relationships. Nobody love me for me. Well, who are you?
Mac Da Don:Are you know?
M:you just this you just become whoever you date, because a lot of you are you lying People love to tell you.
T:Like the part of the story that they love to tell you. Hmm, right like my husband don't do that for me, my wife don't do nothing for me, so nothing. You're gonna speak an absolute Chanel, so just nothing, nothing, right, like they always like to make it look like it's worse than what it is Slice bread.
T:And then I never found a woman to love me for me, but you cheated on all the women Like you. Never gonna mention that part. Oh, you, all the women paid 70% of the bills and you, you, only did 30.
T:Oh you're not gonna mention that part. Oh how most of your money was just for you. And then you tried to carry these women and they decided that you know each, each woman. You treated them the same, like they should have been taking care of you, like you was God's gift to the woman, which is a bizarre concept the Bible and say that no, why the fuck would you want a woman take care of you?
Mac Da Don:I'm gonna say this if you, as a woman, sit here and say I can take care of, I can run, I can do, you should be okay. We're taking care of somebody else.
T:I'm. You see the cotton. Hello he will exist, and so it's some men who, especially when you are accustomed to seeing it inside your upbringing- which a lot of men are Absolutely. They're like well, why not? Especially if you want to walk around, you know, and do it all. So then I mean I'm gonna just sit back and let you do it all and Wow, that's what they do, and now you complain.
M:He can't I can't find a good man, I can't find this. I can't find that. Again, we were talking earlier about a lot of guys are saying you know what? I'm tired of how the mindset is here in the US. I'm going overseas to find me a nice, cultured woman who knows her role and and don't mind being supported to me in what I'm trying to do, and I'm gonna support her and we're gonna become a union and I know we're gonna be gonna do things Now, a lot of America would be pissed off.
M:I would just said that the men are tired of their bullshit and want to go overseas and get a little. Why? Why they won't go overseas? You said we, we're here. Yeah, we know you're here, but you're not doing what you're supposed to be doing. You're not handling your business accordingly.
T:You're trying to be the man and a woman in relationship and you can't or you want to be like the girlfriend and the wife, like you kind of want the hot girl summer, but you also want somebody to take you seriously, right, and it's not.
T:It don't work like that and in the time frame you know for a man to kind of like, feel like he wants to attract a woman, and you know kind of not to say claim, but you know, definitely claim the situation. Ain't nobody trying to be super old doing it, exploring all your options.
M:Hmm, I'm just gonna low.
T:I mean they do. And then a lot of the options that you exploring. You know you didn't even explore yourself during that time because you was too busy exploring all of you know the options. That was outside of yourself, so you didn't work on yourself. You think that your attitude is the best. You think that your physique is like we're supposed to be at, because it's kind of like a weird trend, right?
M:Yeah what's?
T:I don't know what's going on, but like no, your whole physique is off, your mental space is off. And then you, you, you got like bagged in the back, no, or you got a baby or two and that's see what women feel to realize.
M:I think they kind of know, but they're gonna hear it. Men always have options. As long as you have money in your pocket and it's functional, you will always be able to date women from basically 20 it up. You can. You, you can be 60 and date women from 20.
Mac Da Don:Or some shit. Fuck around and have a kid just recently.
M:I think was the narrow.
T:Oh yes, if he got the bag, then you know again he has oh his old asses got buried money, money.
M:That's the thing for men. We have always had the option, for women not so much. You may have the money to buy a guy, but you know is gonna be for money. You know he's not gonna, even though we know it's for money too. But but y'all, y'all got to have money for a guy.
T:Like that. Yeah, but we're also not the older age. The money doesn't really count the same, because it's you know you're paying for, like the tender side, and you can never quite get the baby.
M:Oh yeah.
Mac Da Don:The other issue is that like Niggas don't visual creatures, so like, yeah, you gotta go find a guy who is in it for the for the wrong reason. Mm-hmm and his days like how many times you see no more some woman come up there to a muscle. I think he don't need, I don't think he loves me no more.
M:Oh.
Mac Da Don:He don't wanna ever be there every time I turn to pick up my medication, you know, answer the phone, yeah.
M:Please think that she's paying me. So you know I'm gonna go, I'm gonna be better. Here's an example when we went to Puerto Rico last year, we will sit at a bar and it was a Guy and a younger guy and an older woman and you can look and see was a really it was a Situation ship because she's trying to be up on hold him. He moved his shoulder like yeah, yeah, don't touch me like that, don't touch me here, and eventually he won't go to the bathroom. And he said no, I'm saying watch the TV. He said, okay, I'm gonna change and come back. So he walked away. I looked at him and I kind of look at him like, like what's going on? He just he looked at me like I'm important, I'm on his beautiful resort, so I got going. She came back with swimming steel. Oh, she had all the age spot, liver spot, all the spots on it and she said my mom hugged the form and he just like the look of his face, like the things you got do for money.
Mac Da Don:The thing is I we see women like that all the time. Yeah, you see a very. How many times we've gone to MMA fights? You see some big fat white I can edit cracker, ass cracker sitting there with some Fine ass. Dominican bitch, yes, like fine fine as hell, but you like that. That girl use that for his money. But he understands that this is the relationship that y'all For.
T:Difference between the woman and the man. The woman doesn't, you know, she's just enjoying it. For the time's sake, she kind of got to write the man. I feel like not genuinely, not.
M:To a certain extent I like this, yes and walk around you just look like yeah, you know how I walk around and we know you're paying, we know you on, took your check paying for her to be right. Besides, because no other reason she wouldn't be with you, I'm gonna be, asked yeah but you know it's just like but we're trying to be with you. Don't be in your 50s and 60s trying to find out. I found that new love.
T:Want to be looking for love or your favorite person you know in the older years.
Mac Da Don:Oh god I think you're looking for. I don't think you're looking for a favorite person in your order. Yeah, I think you just trying to make sure that you can spend as much time as you can on the back half a year. It's not by yourself. I Don't think it's anything about trying to find somebody that that loves you, like that.
Mac Da Don:There's somebody to spend the time with exactly somebody to spend time with, and that's why you'll find somebody like, like I said, an older Person, white, black, whatever, with some really young person, because they're like man, I'm always just have some fun, I got the money. I'm not just pay the couple extra dollars and have somebody physical, who looked cute to me, who I could just Fallen over. And there's young people who will sit there and say, fuck, it's a couple dollars, I gotta sit there and be a couple for a little bit. Then so be it, I'm not knocking. This is a. It's a symbiotic relationship, both of y'all using each other. You just understand that you are using each other.
Mac Da Don:And if y'all both okay with that, then who am I to see here and judge you for doing what you think is best? You got money. You want to find a reason to not be alone. Not being alone means you go find some 25 year old chick who don't give a fuck about you, who looks like your daughter and you very much okay with it. You probably isolated from everybody else. You know, because you that damn old with somebody that damn young, I'm pretty sure that anybody else who's close to you know fuck with you at all. Yeah, if I was, I'm 28. If I fuck around, I had a 17 year old girl. My people hold me accountable. I hold myself accountable, but I know my people would too. It was sit there looking me Be like oh man, what he's doing.
T:He's like you know what the fuck is wrong with you? That's a child. And then you bring him around. They why?
M:That's the thing they're like what the hell is he doing and how you? Why y'all still friends that I got. Deal with the aftermath.
T:My man hanging out with you no more, it's like children all over.
Mac Da Don:Yeah he can't come out Because you weird, because you're weird, cuz you sit here with a 70. Oh, thank you sweet. Yeah it's not but that's but. That's where you have people in your life who hold you accountable. People in your life hold you accountable.
T:Keep you from knowing where she like or you run away from the people in your life.
Mac Da Don:Yes.
T:You're right moving away.
M:That is so fucking true and they're the same one. You see, you can't say let me help you out. It's like you've been going through some bad things. Let me help you find get yourself straight, because see, money did the same type of dudes got in with the same situation and Let me, based on what I've seen, those the same was get mad at you. What? You trying to tell me how little my life. Now I'm just telling you how to find some ideas so you're not spending the rest your life rotating bodies, just coming in, coming like hitch, break you off, roll out, and it's always the same reason. They roll out and you keep remembering oh, that's what he wrote. I should change that. No, the next will be different. That's what would be better.
T:It's one thing that they attracted to, though it's got to be. It's got to you know you're not gonna be attracted to the Negative features, right? So we have to think about what's those positive features that you are attracted to. How can you find those features? And somebody who's not quite a dirtbag? Most of these men are kind of like in phases, right? A lot of them won't stay dirtbags forever, right.
T:No, but you just have to make sure that you, as you keep growing, getting up an age, don't keep making the same dumb ass decisions, no, and you don't settle something with somebody in their dirtbaggery stage, like a guy who's trying to be an opportunist, like he don't give you no real like security, but he needs stuff from you. He wanted, you know, winters coming in, the guy trying to, you know, spend a few nights and a few nights turn into a few weeks. I mean I'm all just kicking here. I like no, no, let me, let you kick it at your mother house, come on.
M:Exactly if you was as mama house at age 40 years of age and he could come live with you in your head. Logically speaking, why the fuck what? I want him to move in with me.
T:Yeah like why cuz we could save money, then no you know he's saving money.
M:He got give his mama some money.
T:No, cuz I want me think like oh well, if he move in, you know he can go half on me. He ain't going half on Nothing. That's why he's at his mother's house. Who's about to go half? Is somebody who been going home? That's it.
Mac Da Don:Hello.
T:So if he ain't been paying that whole rent, that whole mortgage, that whole bill by himself, then I mean the chances of him wanting to move in with you at the pain nothing.
Mac Da Don:No, he also want to move in with you. But you know, but you've been. I expect him to be like he's been paying nothing.
T:He's been paying nothing, so how he gonna come in now pay to have no? That's not how men operate. It could not operate like that.
M:No, you can't, and dick don't pay bills.
T:No, it doesn't. No, it doesn't, or the light bill pepco, don't accept that.
M:What you want on this bill.
T:I don't need it.
Mac Da Don:No.
M:I'm good on that. I'm good on that.
T:I just need cash, money, cash got their money you said no, I'm gonna go out and get the cash money while he's set up in the house, and you know. Some people be just like thank you. In his entrepreneurial face.
M:What are you gonna be? A game.
T:Yeah, yeah.
Mac Da Don:You know what I mean gonna be in a studio late.
T:Start this podcast. It's about to go viral. Yeah, like something like that. Stick with me, baby, yeah cuz I'm here, I'm doing something I'm doing. They all gonna make you believe that they're there Productively doing something, but if at the end of the week, productivity Does produces like zero dollars Because it's cool, like you want to start at something that's gonna generate money, but it don't generate money for the right now.
M:Yes you still have to figure out how to generate something for the right now you have to because when you started doing hair you didn't say, well, I'm gonna have to not pay myself. You had to figure out I'm. I need to make enough money to pay booth rent. To pay rent, it was called two jobs oh.
T:I'm gonna just be honest. It was called to most people who start off as a hairstylist, especially 18, 19, 20.
M:You probably got two jobs.
T:One job where you know that's going to absolutely pay you some money and then the other job where it's like now I gotta wait up to build up a clientele. I might have one or two clients this week. I'm 18, 19 years old. How many people flock into your door, especially if you boo friend and they don't know you.
T:You have to stab you I gotta get out there bustle Like and that's a lot of different industry and gig-style work and it's not. I'm not saying it's not good work, but it does take time to get that money coming in. And in the meantime you can't just live off of your boyfriend. You can't, cuz I don't even like how long me and him gonna be down for forever. No, see again. You date him with benefits.
T:So, you literally have to go out and either you getting taken care about your parents because you're still young enough, or you got the two jobs. Yes you don't want to settle with a guy who give who's giving you the lease? I'm not like it's just the bizarre concept.
T:No, and you should want more and a woman who's giving you the lease. It's, culturally, something that right within our culture Culture, because it seems to only be constantly popping up within our people With the idea of bringing, like, the absolute leaf to the table is somehow okay. It's not. I Need a hundred percent of you and I'm gonna give a hundred percent of me, and when we get to that table, that table is going to be Plenty, for that's what it's supposed to be, god damn to you.
M:You always come with the beautiful things. A wrap everything up. I mean, you can throw a puff like he told you, he told y'all y'all gotta be more selective first of all. Y'all know who you are first, before you start to want to date someone and want them to love you for you first of all, who are you?
M:If you don't know who you are, don't go out there and do that shit, because then if somebody else wants to tell you who you are, trust me there's gonna be a dollar sign behind that, because we're gonna tell you a whole lot of things, but you're gonna pay for it, hook, line and sinker and you're gonna feel good about it, but your pockets ain't gonna feel so good because you're gonna make sure they're gonna get this.
M:They're little part of that, that color, that dude of that money. So you know, just Learn about yourselves. Don't rush into situations. Get to know your partners. Discuss you, know you like, dislikes and ultimately where you going. Marriage is down the road. Don't even worry about marriage. Can you just become friends and understand each other first?
T:first and yes, yes y'all.
M:Y'all need to have friends. So you know, this discussion start with pre enough and we ended with friendship. So we just need you to get your minds right. So with that we're gonna end this episode. I want to mic with them and see people. You know what you do. Hit that like button, subscribe to the channel. Hit the little bell so you can sit here when the next one is coming out, but it newest information is coming out. So with that Next time. Peace and love.